How the Gospel Protects Me

Today at church in our new ward, JB and I were asked to speak in sacrament meeting. What follows below is the text of my talk.

My topic today is: “How living the gospel of Jesus Christ protects my family.”

I think many of the most powerful sermons are taught in the Primary songs. I love the messages they convey. They are simple, direct, and powerful.

In the Primary song (and in Hymn no. 303), we sing:

“Keep the commandments; keep the commandments!

In this there is safety; in this there is peace.

He will send blessings; He will send blessings.

Words of a prophet: Keep the commandments.

In this there is safety and peace.”

There is protection in keeping the commandments. When we keep the commandments, our Heavenly Father sends the blessings we can claim by no other means than by choosing to obey Him. It teaches us to be truly happy, because “wickedness never was happiness” (Alma 41:10). The adversary would have us choose poorly and even become addicted to things that would take away our free agency and will make us miserable.

When we make mistakes and break a commandment, however, there is protection in repentance through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. When we come to our Heavenly Father in humility and prayer, how long does it take for the Atonement to take effect in our lives? Alma answers this question in Alma 34:

“Now is the time and the day of your salvation; and therefore, if ye will repent and harden not your hearts, immediately shall the great plan of redemption be brought about unto you” (Alma 34:31; emphasis added).

The Atonement will begin to work in our lives just as soon as we ask for it! Immediately the Savior’s healing process begins.

In another Primary song, we sing: “The wise man built his house upon the rock” (Children’s Songbook, no. 281).

In Helaman chapter 5, Helaman teaches us about this rock:

“Remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall.”

Christ will help us to weather the storms of this life. Sometimes, the storm can be quite literally an actual storm. When I was 13 years old, I lived with my family on the island of Puerto Rico. When I first learned that Hurricane Hugo was headed our way, I was terrified. I’d never been through anything like this before. But we were prepared. The prophets had long taught (and are still teaching) us to prepare for calamities with food storage, including also a first aid kit, clean water, clothing, batteries, etc. As the storm approached, the store shelves became emptied and bare as others panicked and rushed to buy what they would need to get them through the next days and weeks. But we never had to worry about that. All around us there was destruction, but we were OK. Our community and our island rebuilt. Home teachers ensured we were doing well and had everything we needed.

In yet another Primary song, we sing: “Mine is a home where every hour is blessed by the strength of priesthood pow’r” (Children’s Songbook, no. 190). The priesthood can bless not only our homes but every aspect of our lives. Through priesthood ordinances, we make covenants with our Heavenly Father that will protect us as we journey through life.

Elder Dale G. Renlund of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles has taught:

“By making and keeping temple covenants, we learn more about the Lord’s purposes and receive a fulness of the Holy Ghost. We receive direction for our lives. We mature in our discipleship so that we do not remain perpetual, unknowing children. Rather, we live with an eternal perspective and are more motivated to serve God and others. We receive increased capacity to fulfill our purposes in mortality. We are protected from evil, and we gain greater power to resist temptation and to repent when we stumble. When we falter, the memory of our covenants with God helps us return to the path. … Ultimately, our destinies are changed because the covenant path leads to exaltation and eternal life.

“Keeping covenants made in baptismal fonts and in temples also provides us with strength to withstand mortality’s trials and heartaches” (“Accessing God’s Power through Covenants,” April 2023 general conference).

The gift of the Holy Ghost is indeed one of our Father in Heaven’s greatest blessings and a source of protection. He warns us of danger and reminds us of what is good and true. The Comforter has accompanied me when I have experienced the loss of loved ones, including most recently my dear mother, who passed away this past November. In the days and weeks that followed her death, I became reacquainted with the Comforter in ways I never expected. I love her and will always miss her, but I am at peace because of His comfort. I testify that He is real.

The gospel of Jesus Christ protects us in so many other ways, both temporally as well as spiritually. The Word of Wisdom, for example, protects us from many avoidable illnesses, including freedom from addiction to harmful substances. The law of chastity helps us to avoid unnecessary pain and suffering and things that would poison our minds and spirits. Tithing and fast offerings help us learn to be less selfish while also bringing with them specific blessings of a financial nature. In my previous calling in our last ward, I had the privilege to see up close on a weekly basis how our bishop used fast offering funds to help people in our ward in numerous ways. It never ceased to amaze me what good could be done.

I love how devoted the Church is to helping us succeed in every aspect of our lives. From self-reliance, job training, and money management classes to LDS Social Services, including mental health and addiction recovery counseling, to its welfare and humanitarian projects, the Church helps us to make of ourselves the best disciples we can be.

One final thought before I close:  Though the gospel protects us from many things, we may not always be “protected,” at least not in the way we might think, from the difficult, gut-wrenching trials of life. The gospel can help us to protect ourselves against unwanted consequences, yet adversity comes to us all.

For example, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego were protected from burning to death in the fiery furnace, while Abinadi was not. John Taylor was shot and survived assassins’ bullets, while Joseph and Hyrum Smith did not. The 2,060 stripling warriors were saved from death in battle, while other righteous warriors weren’t. Some are healed from devastating illness, and some are not. Some struggle with money problems and job loss, and others don’t. Some missionaries serve with no significant health problems, yet others must return home early and even some contract illnesses, injuries, or challenges that remain with them for the rest of their mortal lives. And so forth.

In my experience, it is not good to dwell on the why or the how of these kinds of things. It doesn’t do any good to speculate when Heavenly Father has not provided a reason. “(We) cannot behold with (our) natural eyes, for the present time, the design of (our) God concerning those things which shall come hereafter, and the glory which shall follow after much tribulation. For after much tribulation come the blessings. Wherefore the day cometh that (we) shall be crowned with much glory; the hour is not yet, but is nigh at hand” (D&C 58:3-4).

What we can do, however, is to decide how we will respond to life’s difficulties and what we will make of the talents that have been given to us. (See Matthew 25:14-30.)

Elder Neal A. Maxwell taught: “The great challenge is to refuse to let the bad things that happen to us do bad things to us. That is the crucial difference between adversity and tragedy” (“But for a Small Moment,” address delivered at Brigham Young University, September 1, 1974). Our free agency is the only gift we really have that is ours to offer our Savior, and His greatest and everlasting blessings are reserved for those who do so.

Elder Dennis E. Simmons of the Seventy spoke on this point in the April 2004 general conference, in one of the best general conference talks I’ve ever heard. I may be a bit biased, as I was sitting in the choir seats behind Elder Simmons for this talk. (Elder Maxwell also spoke in that session; it was his last conference talk before he passed away.)

He said: “When Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego refused to bow down and worship a golden image set up by the king, a furious Nebuchadnezzar told them that if they would not worship as commanded, they would immediately be cast into a burning fiery furnace. ‘And who is that God that shall deliver you out of my hands?’

“The three young men quickly and confidently responded, ‘If it be so [if you cast us into the furnace], our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand.’ … But then they demonstrated that they fully understood what faith is. They continued, ‘But if not, … we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up.’ That is a statement of true faith. …

“Our God will deliver us from ridicule and persecution, but if not. … Our God will deliver us from sickness and disease, but if not. … He will deliver us from loneliness, depression, or fear, but if not. … Our God will deliver us from threats, accusations, and insecurity, but if not. … He will deliver us from death or impairment of loved ones, but if not, … we will trust in the Lord.

“Our God will see that we receive justice and fairness, but if not. … He will make sure that we are loved and recognized, but if not. … We will receive a perfect companion and righteous and obedient children, but if not, … we will have faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, knowing that if we do all we can do, we will, in His time and in His way, be delivered and receive all that He has” (“But If Not …,” April 2004 general conference).

I testify that our Heavenly Father loves us, so much so that He sent His Son, Jesus Christ, into the world to take our pains, sicknesses, and sins upon Him so that we may return to Them, safe and sound. In the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

Death, Taxes, and a Few Other Sure Things

I was asked to give a short talk in my ward's sacrament meeting today. I have posted my remarks below. Happy Easter, friends.

Jana and I recently watched the new Ken Burns documentary on Benjamin Franklin, one of our Founding Fathers. I’m a history buff, and I even majored in the subject in college until I realized one day, “Yikes, I’m majoring in history.” Franklin’s is, of course, the portrait on one of my favorite pieces of U.S. currency. If a hip hop musical were ever created about his life, I would most seriously consider listening to it.

It was interesting to me to learn that when the Constitution was adopted, he wasn’t completely sure it was last---though he hoped it would. He observed: “In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes.” A cynic today might look at the state of the world and reach the same conclusion.

Five years ago this weekend, death and taxes converged for me on the same day when my father passed away following a long illness on Saturday, April 15 (2017). Earlier that day, I got the impression to go and visit him in the care center. Jana and I were dating at that time, and she got the same impression. I’m so glad we followed that prompting. Had I waited to go and visit him the next day, on Easter Sunday, with the Easter candy I planned to bring, it would’ve been too late.

On that day, I got to hug him one last time and tell him once more that I loved him. Just a few hours later, he was gone. The doctors had given him six months; he lasted only nine more days. Though it was an expected loss, it occurred unexpectedly quickly, and it was a painful one.

When I arrived at the hospital that night, Dad had already passed. My siblings and I recalled numerous funny stories we remembered about Dad; it was a mix of laughter amid the tears. Upon leaving the hospital, I suddenly realized that it was past midnight, and that the day had changed from Saturday night to Sunday morning---it was Easter morning! The timing of this loss was a tender mercy to me and to our family.

In addition, the Comforter came in an unexpected way. The words of a favorite scripture appeared in my mind as I drove home. I saw or heard them repeated very clearly:

“I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die” (John 11:25-26).

In the April 1992 general conference, Elder Marion D. Hanks of the Seventy related the following:

“Let me share with you the tender story of an eleven-year-old boy named Philip, a Down’s syndrome child who was in a Sunday School class with eight other children.

“Easter Sunday the teacher brought an empty plastic egg for each child. They were instructed to go out of the church building onto the grounds and put into the egg something that would remind them of the meaning of Easter.

“All returned joyfully. As each egg was opened there were exclamations of delight at a butterfly, a twig, a flower, a blade of grass. Then the last egg was opened. It was Philip’s, and it was empty!

“Some of the children made fun of Philip. ‘But, teacher,’ he said, ‘teacher, the tomb was empty.’

“A newspaper article announcing Philip’s death a few months later noted that at the conclusion of the funeral eight children marched forward and put a large empty egg on the small casket. On it was a banner that said, ‘The tomb was empty’” (Ensign, May 1992, p. 11).

The tomb was empty---and yet that tomb with nothing and no one inside gave us everything! Our Savior gave us the two greatest gifts He could: triumphing over sin through the Atonement and over death with His Resurrection. Beyond death and taxes, the gospel gives us so many certain things in this life, and many reasons to have great hope in the next one.

The Prophet Joseph Smith taught: “The fundamental principles of our religion are the testimony of the Apostles and Prophets concerning Jesus Christ, that he died, was buried, and rose again the third day, and ascended to heaven; and all other things which pertain to our religion are only appendages to it” (Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, p. 121).

That is why we are here, today and every other week. We take the sacrament as an appendage to the Atonement and the Resurrection. We meet here on Sundays as an appendage. Our missionary and temple work are appendages to it. We have so much to be grateful for and so many reasons to rejoice this day and every other as followers of Christ.

Brothers and sisters, I know that my Redeemer lives. I also know that the gift of the Holy Ghost is real and is also one of our Father’s greatest gifts to us. In the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

By Love Unfeigned

In the April 2014 general conference, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland gave one of my favorite talks of the last decade, "The Cost---and Blessings---of Discipleship." In this message, speaking to the youth of the Church, he said:

"You may wonder if it is worth it to take a courageous moral stand in high school or to go on a mission only to have your most cherished beliefs reviled or strive against much in society that sometimes ridicules a life of religious devotion. Yes, it is worth it, because the alternative is to have our 'houses' left unto us 'desolate'---desolate individuals, desolate families, desolate neighborhoods, and desolate nations."

Though no longer a youth of the Church, I still took this challenge personally. This is my motivation behind why I post a lot of things I post on social media; because there are a lot of "false and vain and foolish doctrines" all around us to lead people astray, just as Nephi prophesied (2 Nephi 28:9) If we don't teach the truth to others and to the next generation, the wolves in sheep's clothing will teach them their dogma in its place.

Elder Holland later concluded his talk with the admonition:

"Be strong. Live the gospel faithfully even if others around you don't live it at all. Defend your beliefs with courtesy and compassion, but defend them."

And therein lies the great challenge---defending our beliefs, but "with courtesy and compassion."

I haven't always been successful at this in my social media experience. It's caused me to lose sleep on more than one occasion after a discussion turned contentious.

The thing of it is: No one was ever won over to a cause by an argument, anger, or contention.

In the Doctrine and Covenants, we are taught:

"No power or influence can or ought to be maintained by virture of the priesthood, only by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned;

"By kindness, and pure knowledge, which shall greatly enlarge the soul without hypocrisy, and without guile---

"Reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of love toward him whom thou hast reproved, lest he esteem thee to be his enemy;

"That he may know that thy faithfulness is stronger than the cords of death.

"Let thy bowels also be full of charity towards all men, and to the household of faith, and let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God; and the doctrine of the priesthood shall distil upon thy soul as the dews from heaven.

"The Holy Ghost shall be thy constant companion, and thy scepter an unchanging scepter of righteousness and truth; and thy dominion shall be an everlasting dominion, and without compulsory means it shall flow unto thee forever and ever" (D&C 121:41-46; emphasis added).

As in so many other things, the gospel and the scriptures show us how to treat others and to love our fellow men.

The only point in my life in which I consistently was been able to see people change was through these very principles and it was, of course, the two years of my Church mission. On a regular basis, I got to help others feel the Spirit, identify His presence and witness, and then invite them to make very significant changes in their lives. Though many did not ultimately make these changes, even after feeling this powerful witness, some did---and miracles came as a result.

The Spirit and the truth did this; I didn't. I was just the messenger. As Paul said: "I have planted ... but God gave the increase" (1 Cor. 3:6).

If there are any who are reading this with whom I've had a disagreement at any point, I'm sorry. I was not my best self then. I'm still not, but I'm working to be a better self every day, even as I make mistakes. Odds are, so are you.

The gospel means everything to me, and I have a lot of opinions both about that and about current affairs that you'll see from time to time if we're connected on social media. Friendship also means a great deal to me. And, fortunately, having beliefs/opinions and friends with whom you disagree on some issues is not a mutually exclusive choice.

An added bonus: There is the option on many social media sites to hide certain posts from those people that are bound and determined to argue no matter what (while still letting them see other posts), even if you simply post something as horrifying as, say, "The sky is a beautiful blue today!" (They'll find a way somehow---trust me.) The importance of this option cannot be understated.

Adversity

JB and I spoke in our ward's sacrament meeting earlier today. This is what I spoke on:

Good morning, brothers and sisters. I am grateful for this opportunity Jana and I have been given to speak to you today. We are so grateful for the outpouring of love and fellowship we’ve felt here since we moved in to the Stone Creek Ward five months ago.

Up until we joined this ward, I’d spent the vast majority of my adult post-mission life in singles wards. So, serving as a Webelos leader is something very new for me. I’m 42 years old, and she has been . . . let’s say 29 for a few birthdays now. We’re a bit older than most newlyweds.

Jana and I met a few years ago in our mid-singles ward, the Bountiful 8^th Ward, after it was organized in 2014. For those for whom the term mid-singles ward might sound made up: It’s a real thing for singles ages 31 through 45. Ours covered a large area, from North Salt Lake and Woods Cross up through Kaysville. Some call it the “Island of Misfit Toys,” though I like to think of it as the “remedial” singles ward. After we first met, Jana and I went on a handful of dates. It took a few years after that for me to get my head screwed on straight and to ask her out again, and after 16 months of dating and engagement, we were sealed in the Bountiful temple in April.

My topic today is adversity. When we think of adversity, we don’t have to look very far to see it all around us. We just have to step outside right now and see the smoke in the air to be reminded that firefighters in our state are currently battling some very devastating fires. We merely have to turn on the news to see images of widespread destruction caused by hurricanes, monsoons, earthquakes, and other natural disasters, “wars and rumors of wars” (Matthew 24:6), famine, shootings, domestic violence, and a number of other troubles. In addition to these troubles are the challenges of chronic physical and mental pain and illness, injury, disability, job loss, poverty, and the death of our loved ones.

For many of the people in the ward where Jana and I met, adversity comes in the form of loneliness for those remaining single into their 30s and 40s—and beyond. Sister Wendy Watson Nelson, for example, did not marry until much later in her life. There are some of ours who, sadly, may never marry in this lifetime. Still others who have married have endured the pain of the death of a spouse, infertility, wayward children, and other difficulties.’’

We live very much in a day and time when Paul prophesied: “In the last days perilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasure more than lovers of God; having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof.” Later in this chapter, Paul adds: “All that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution” (2 Timothy 3:1-5, 12).

It has always been this way for us in this mortal sphere. President Spencer W. Kimball taught: “We knew before we were born that we were coming to the earth for bodies and experience and that we would have joys and sorrows, pain and comforts, ease and hardships, health and sickness, successes and disappointments; and we knew also that we would die. We accepted all these eventualities with a glad heart eager to accept both the favorable and unfavorable. … We were willing to come and take life as it came” (Improvement Era, Mar. 1996, 217).

Elder Robert D. Hales of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles also taught: “The scriptures teach that ‘there is … opposition in all things’ (2 Ne. 2:11). Just as times of joy and happiness come to each of us, so also comes pain to every mortal. How can we understand those moments in our life when we experience physical or emotional pain? …

“I have come to understand how useless it is to dwell on the whys, what ifs, and if onlys for which there likely will be given no answers in mortality. To receive the Lord’s comfort, we must exercise faith. The questions Why me? Why our family? Why now? are usually unanswerable questions. These questions detract from our spirituality and can destroy our faith. We need to spend our time and energy building our faith by turning to the Lord and asking for strength to overcome the pains and trials of this world and to endure to the end for greater understanding” (“Healing Soul and Body,” October 1998 general conference).

In my preparation for this talk, and through studying the words and teaching of both ancient and modern prophets, I have come up with a list of four important concepts I have learned through adversity.

The first item on this list is the vital importance of keeping God’s commandments. I think it’s important to note that there is often a difference between trials and the consequences of our sins. Others’ misuse of agency may harm us. And when we sin, misusing our own agency, we must also face the consequences of those actions, becoming our own “worst enemy” or source of adversity.

In the most recent Face to Face broadcast, Elder Quentin L. Cook of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles talked about adversity and said: “Some of that (comes) because there’s agency and some of that because there’s adversary.”

King Benjamin teaches: “The natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father” (Mosiah 3:19).

Because Christ has already suffered for our sins, we do not have to suffer for them if we will turn from the natural man to Him and repent through His Atonement. Speaking of Christ, Paul tells us in the Epistle to the Hebrews: “Though he were a Son, yet he learned obedience by the things which he suffered” (Hebrews 5:8). We must learn to do the same.

President Henry B. Eyring spoke to our duty when it comes to obedience. He said: “The great test of life is to see whether we will hearken to and obey God’s commands in the midst of the storms of life. It is not to endure storms, but to choose the right while they rage” (“Spiritual Preparedness: Start Early and Be Steady,” October 2005 general conference).

It’s not possible to fully avoid adversity in this life, but we can still avoid a number of troubles by obeying gospel laws.

Second: Through adversity, we are given opportunities to grow spiritually. Trials help us to learn just what we are made of; they stretch and mold us into the kind of person Heavenly Father would like us to become.

Mother Theresa said: “I know God won’t give me anything I can’t handle. I just wish he didn’t trust me so much.”

Toward the end of the “War Chapters” in the Book of Mormon, Mormon tells us: “Because of the exceedingly great length of the war between the Nephites and the Lamanites many had become hardened, because of the exceedingly great length of the war; and many were softened because of their afflictions, insomuch that they did humble themselves before God, even in the depth of humility” (Alma 62:41).

These Saints had endured the same trial together; and while some had grown bitter, others had grown better.

Another scriptural example that comes to my mind is that of Abraham. At a very old age, he and Sarah were finally blessed with Isaac, a son born in the covenant. And yet, in what was most imaginably gut-wrenching to Abraham, he was commanded to offer up this son as a sacrifice in a test of his faith. Well, we all know what happened. Abraham and Isaac both obeyed; and at the last moment, an angel intervened to save Isaac’s life.

BYU Professor Truman G. Madsen wrote about a time when he was with President Hugh B. Brown of the First Presidency in Hebron, near Abraham’s tomb:

“I (asked President Brown), ‘Why ... was Abraham commanded to go to Mount Moriah and offer his only hope of posterity?’

“It was clear that this man, nearly ninety, had thought and prayed and wept over that question before. He finally said, ‘Abraham needed to learn something about Abraham’” (Five Classics by Truman G. Madsen [2001], 232).

Viktor Frankl, author of Man’s Search for Meaning, was imprisoned in Auschwitz concentration camp during World War II. Even under such wretched conditions, he later wrote that people could nevertheless still decide what their attitudes would be: “We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way."

Thirdly, adversity gives us an opportunity to serve and minister to our fellow man.

In the Sermon on the Mount, the Savior taught: “Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hid. Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven” (Matthew 5:14-16).

Whenever and wherever a natural disaster occurs, members of the Church are always among the first ones there to help. A few years ago, following a hurricane in the Southern states, I remember reading about a cleanup effort the Church had headed. One very grateful woman was quoted as saying that she was especially grateful to two groups in particular for their help: the Latter-day Saints and the Mormons.

I very much feel for those who have been affected by Hurricane Florence recently, because I have been where they’ve been. When I was 13 years old, my family and I lived in Puerto Rico, where we weathered one of the worst storms ever to occur to that date. (Last year’s Hurricane Maria was much worse.)

Hurricane Hugo pummeled our island, and it went on to destroy other areas of the Caribbean and southeastern United States. Following the widespread destruction, we surveyed the damage, and it was extensive. It was at this time that I gained a testimony of the importance of heeding the prophets’ counsel to store a year-long supply of food, clean water, batteries, and other necessities, because we would desperately need them in the ensuing weeks.

What good can come of such a catastrophe? On the surface, it’s hard to say. The lives lost can’t be restored nor the extensive damage undone. But to give one example, I recall a cleanup service project I took part in with the youth in my ward. We went to a nearby park to clean up and carry away the fallen branches and leaves, to mow the grass, and other tasks. As we worked, residents of this neighborhood, most likely none of whom were of our faith, noticed what we were doing, and a few came out to help us. A few others brought us soda and snacks. They learned we were there representing our Church. It may have been the first contact with the Church they’d had in their lives, and we hoped it was a positive one. It certainly was a memorable one for me.

We have multiple opportunities to help bear each other’s burdens here, today, in Bountiful, Utah. There is much of pain and suffering that we can help alleviate when we look at those in need here in our neighborhoods and communities, at our workplaces, in our families, and in our very own homes. There are numerous chances to find those we can serve as we seek for and follow promptings through the Holy Ghost.

Fourth: Enduring adversity helps us to develop Christlike qualities of love, compassion, and empathy for others.

In his book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Dr. Stephen Covey tells the story of being on a train one day, where he found himself annoyed by two very noisy kids causing a disturbance to everyone around them. He noticed that the father was doing nothing about them. After a moment of restraint, he approached the father. Here’s Dr. Covey’s account of what happened next:

“Sir, your children are really disturbing a lot of people. I wonder if you couldn’t control them a little more?

“The man lifted his gaze as if to come to a consciousness of the situation for the first time and said softly, ‘Oh, you’re right. I guess I should do something about it. We just came from the hospital where their mother died about an hour ago. I don’t know what to think, and I guess they don’t know how to handle it either.’

“Can you imagine what I felt at that moment? My paradigm shifted. Suddenly I saw things differently, I felt differently, I behaved differently. My irritation vanished. I didn’t have to worry about controlling my attitude or my behavior; my heart was filled with the man’s pain. Feelings of sympathy and compassion flowed freely. Everything changed in an instant.”

Along these same lines, President Eyring shared what he said was some of the best advice he’d ever been given: “When you meet someone, treat them as if they were in serious trouble, and you will be right more than half the time” (“In the Strength of the Lord,” April 2004 general conference).

Or, in the words of one of my favorite hymns of the Church: “In the quiet heart is hidden sorrow that the eyes can’t see” (Hymns, no. 220, “Lord, I Would Follow Thee”).

A few years ago, while I was looking for a new place to live, I had a few leads to move in with some friends; and yet I had the distinct impression I needed to move back in with my parents for a short while. It was not long after this that I learned one big reason, perhaps, I may have felt this impression: My father was diagnosed with dementia. It was astonishing to observe how quickly this illness took its toll on both his mind and on his body. Over the ensuing 18 months, I learned a great deal about patience, charity, and humility as I watched him suffer.

In the process, I was given a great gift: this small window of precious time, time I now look back upon as sacred, to give back to my father some of what he had given me all of my life before then. It was in simple things like driving him to get his hair cut or taking him out to lunch. It was mostly through just spending time sitting by him and talking to him as we watched sports on TV.

It’s been said that the only two guarantees in life are death and taxes. Well, after enduring his illness as well as anyone could have, Dad died on April 15 last year. On that final day of his mortal life, I was granted one additional blessing—a tender mercy to me—in the form of a spiritual prompting. By this point, Dad’s motor skills had deteriorated to the point he could not even walk around on his own, and we were forced to put him in a home where he could be cared for. He would be there for just nine days.

The next day was Easter, so my thought initially was to buy him some Easter candy that Saturday and then to bring it to him on Easter Sunday, when I could spend more time with him. Instead, the prompting was to go and see him that afternoon and not to delay. For one last moment, I got to visit with Dad, to embrace him and to tell him one last time that I love him. Jana and I had just begun dating at this time, and she felt the same prompting.

Just a few, short hours later, the phone call came that Dad had been rushed to the hospital in cardiac arrest. By the time we arrived in the emergency room, he was gone. And yet, in the confusion and the chaos, I was at peace. I was comforted. Though I was deeply saddened to lose him, and I still miss him today, I became reacquainted with the Comforter that night and in the days and weeks that would follow.

When my siblings and my mother and I left the hospital, it was past midnight and it had become Easter Sunday. The timing of it all was, in my mind, no coincidence. It was a blessed reminder from a loving Heavenly Father that He is in control. Because of Easter and a loving Savior—“dearly, dearly has he loved!” (Hymns, no. 194, “There Is a Green Hill Far Away”), as we sang in the sacrament hymn—Dad lives on, and I will have the chance to embrace him again.

Perspective is an extraordinary blessing. Elder Orson F. Whitney of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught: “No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude, and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God, ... and it is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire” (Improvement Era, Mar. 1966, 211).

How grateful I am for the Atonement of Jesus Christ, which encompasses so many griefs and woes and strengthens us to endure the crosses we are called to bear in this life, whichever crosses they may be.

Elder Neal A. Maxwell of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught: “Trying to comprehend the trials and meaning of this life without understanding Heavenly Father’s marvelously encompassing plan of salvation is like trying to understand a three-act play while seeing only the second act. Fortunately, our knowledge of the Savior, Jesus Christ, and His Atonement helps us to endure our trials and to see purpose in suffering and to trust God for what we cannot comprehend.

“Revealed truths reassure us that we are enclosed in divine empathy. As Enoch witnessed, we worship a God who wept over needless human misery and wickedness (see Moses 7:28-29, 33, 37). Jesus’ perfect empathy was ensured when, along with His Atonement for our sins, He took upon Himself our sicknesses, sorrows, griefs, and infirmities and came to know these ‘according to the flesh’ (Alma 7:11-12). He did this in order that He might be filled with perfect, personal mercy and empathy and thereby know how to succor us in our infirmities. He thus fully comprehends human suffering. Truly Christ ‘descended below all things, in that He comprehended all things’ (D&C 88:6). …

“Part of enduring well consists of being meek enough, amid our suffering, to learn from our relevant experiences. Rather than simply passing through these things, they must pass through us and do so in ways which sanctify these experiences for our good (see D&C 122:7). Thereby, our empathy, too, is enriched and everlasting” (“Enduring Well,” April 1997 general conference).

I add my testimony his. I testify that we have an all-wise, all-knowing, all-loving Savior who shows us how to love as He did. President Russell M. Nelson leads His Church on Earth today. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Death, Taxes, and Other Sure Things

I recently gave a talk in church. The occasion, in case you hadn't guessed from my recent posts, was Dad's funeral. Here is what I spoke about:

There is an old saying that the only sureties in life are death and taxes. Well, Dad passed away April 15.

Dad had a great sense of humor. But in all seriousness, and in the few minutes I have today, I'd like to talk about some of the most important things he gave me (besides nearsightedness and the bald spot):

1) Time. President Dieter F. Uchtdorf taught: "In family relationships, love is really spelled T-I-M-E." Dad gave us his time, and he was thoroughly invested in our lives. Whether it was yelling from the sidelines as a coach or just an anxious parent, he was there at our basketball and soccer games and hardly ever missed one. He supported us in our hobbies and interests. We knew he cared, and his love language was the time he gave.

2) Work. Dad taught us to work. The plowboy who grew up on a farm in Smithfield and learned the value of an honest day's labor taught his children that you don't get something for nothing and you have to work for it. We were given an allowance, but we had to do our chores (weeding, mowing the lawn, etc.) to earn it. For years, we had a paper route, waking up at 5:00 or 5:30 a.m. even on school days and holidays, and he worked right alongside us, never taking a cent for himself. Those lessons carried me through part-time jobs in high school and college and into the present.

3) He taught me five simple words that stand out: excuse me, please, and thank you. I vividly remember him teaching me to use these words when I was growing up. Good manners were and are important. Knowing and using these words have helped me open countless doors in my daily interactions with people and my work experience.

Though Dad passed on a Saturday night, as a family we left the hospital when it was already Sunday morning. Easter Sunday! The timing of it all, we think, was not a coincidence. And the most important message in the world is still, as the Prophet Joseph Smith described, that Jesus Christ "died, was buried, and rose again the third day, and ascended into heaven; and all other things which pertain to our religion are only appendages to it."

In a world rife with "fake news," rumors of wars, fads that come and go, the philosophies of men, and other false Christs the prophets saw would be abundant in our day, my knowledge of the Atonement and Resurrection of Jesus Christ is, in addition to death and taxes, the third sure thing in my life; and not only do I believe it, but I also know it through the Holy Spirit.

In the New Testament, Paul said that "this thing (the gospel) was not done in a corner" (Acts 26:26), and Peter spoke of the world's "cunningly devised fables" (2 Peter 1:16). Elder Jeffrey R. Holland recently spoke on "cunningly devised fables" in his Face 2 Face event:

"This is not a cunningly devised fable. This is God's truth. I want all of you here and afar to know that I know that this is the work and kingdom of God on earth. I am more certain of that than anything I know, anything I have seen, anything I have ever heard, and anything I hope to embrace in the future."

Today, I echo what he taught. When we talk of the concepts of resurrection and eternal families, not only are these good or neat ideas; I testify that they are true! And that knowledge carries me at this time and will carry me in future days.

In an all-wise, all-loving Heavenly Father's magnificent plan, there is so much more in store for us than wearing halos and playing harps in heaven! He has so much more in store for us, and it is beautiful and wonderful to think of. Death is a necessary part of that plan. Though we mourn today, we also rejoice.

Paul said: "For now we see through a glass, darkly" (1 Corinthians 13:12). I know that Dad now sees clearly. I take great hope in the knowledge that he is reunited with his parents, my Uncle Dexter, and other loved ones who have gone on before.

Dad was sick for a long time. Some of his thorns in the flesh he carried for all of his life on Earth. He is now free of them. I don't know why Dad had to suffer through those nor the illness that ultimately claimed his mortal life. (How can any of us know for sure why these things happen while "we see through a glass, darkly"?)

Neverthless, like Nephi, though "I do not know the meaning of all things," "I know that he (God) loveth his children." I know that (1) our Heavenly Father loved Dad and (2) Dad loved his children and his grandchildren.

I testify of the importance of the gift of the Holy Ghost. His presence has been so important to me over the past week. When we got the call that Dad had been taken to the hospital, I felt urgency to get there, and yet I also felt peace. I feel at peace today. The Spirit, also known as the Comforter, has comforted when I have been sad, and He has given me also joy in the knowledge of these things, of which I testify in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.