How the Gospel Protects Me

Today at church in our new ward, JB and I were asked to speak in sacrament meeting. What follows below is the text of my talk.

My topic today is: “How living the gospel of Jesus Christ protects my family.”

I think many of the most powerful sermons are taught in the Primary songs. I love the messages they convey. They are simple, direct, and powerful.

In the Primary song (and in Hymn no. 303), we sing:

“Keep the commandments; keep the commandments!

In this there is safety; in this there is peace.

He will send blessings; He will send blessings.

Words of a prophet: Keep the commandments.

In this there is safety and peace.”

There is protection in keeping the commandments. When we keep the commandments, our Heavenly Father sends the blessings we can claim by no other means than by choosing to obey Him. It teaches us to be truly happy, because “wickedness never was happiness” (Alma 41:10). The adversary would have us choose poorly and even become addicted to things that would take away our free agency and will make us miserable.

When we make mistakes and break a commandment, however, there is protection in repentance through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. When we come to our Heavenly Father in humility and prayer, how long does it take for the Atonement to take effect in our lives? Alma answers this question in Alma 34:

“Now is the time and the day of your salvation; and therefore, if ye will repent and harden not your hearts, immediately shall the great plan of redemption be brought about unto you” (Alma 34:31; emphasis added).

The Atonement will begin to work in our lives just as soon as we ask for it! Immediately the Savior’s healing process begins.

In another Primary song, we sing: “The wise man built his house upon the rock” (Children’s Songbook, no. 281).

In Helaman chapter 5, Helaman teaches us about this rock:

“Remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall.”

Christ will help us to weather the storms of this life. Sometimes, the storm can be quite literally an actual storm. When I was 13 years old, I lived with my family on the island of Puerto Rico. When I first learned that Hurricane Hugo was headed our way, I was terrified. I’d never been through anything like this before. But we were prepared. The prophets had long taught (and are still teaching) us to prepare for calamities with food storage, including also a first aid kit, clean water, clothing, batteries, etc. As the storm approached, the store shelves became emptied and bare as others panicked and rushed to buy what they would need to get them through the next days and weeks. But we never had to worry about that. All around us there was destruction, but we were OK. Our community and our island rebuilt. Home teachers ensured we were doing well and had everything we needed.

In yet another Primary song, we sing: “Mine is a home where every hour is blessed by the strength of priesthood pow’r” (Children’s Songbook, no. 190). The priesthood can bless not only our homes but every aspect of our lives. Through priesthood ordinances, we make covenants with our Heavenly Father that will protect us as we journey through life.

Elder Dale G. Renlund of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles has taught:

“By making and keeping temple covenants, we learn more about the Lord’s purposes and receive a fulness of the Holy Ghost. We receive direction for our lives. We mature in our discipleship so that we do not remain perpetual, unknowing children. Rather, we live with an eternal perspective and are more motivated to serve God and others. We receive increased capacity to fulfill our purposes in mortality. We are protected from evil, and we gain greater power to resist temptation and to repent when we stumble. When we falter, the memory of our covenants with God helps us return to the path. … Ultimately, our destinies are changed because the covenant path leads to exaltation and eternal life.

“Keeping covenants made in baptismal fonts and in temples also provides us with strength to withstand mortality’s trials and heartaches” (“Accessing God’s Power through Covenants,” April 2023 general conference).

The gift of the Holy Ghost is indeed one of our Father in Heaven’s greatest blessings and a source of protection. He warns us of danger and reminds us of what is good and true. The Comforter has accompanied me when I have experienced the loss of loved ones, including most recently my dear mother, who passed away this past November. In the days and weeks that followed her death, I became reacquainted with the Comforter in ways I never expected. I love her and will always miss her, but I am at peace because of His comfort. I testify that He is real.

The gospel of Jesus Christ protects us in so many other ways, both temporally as well as spiritually. The Word of Wisdom, for example, protects us from many avoidable illnesses, including freedom from addiction to harmful substances. The law of chastity helps us to avoid unnecessary pain and suffering and things that would poison our minds and spirits. Tithing and fast offerings help us learn to be less selfish while also bringing with them specific blessings of a financial nature. In my previous calling in our last ward, I had the privilege to see up close on a weekly basis how our bishop used fast offering funds to help people in our ward in numerous ways. It never ceased to amaze me what good could be done.

I love how devoted the Church is to helping us succeed in every aspect of our lives. From self-reliance, job training, and money management classes to LDS Social Services, including mental health and addiction recovery counseling, to its welfare and humanitarian projects, the Church helps us to make of ourselves the best disciples we can be.

One final thought before I close:  Though the gospel protects us from many things, we may not always be “protected,” at least not in the way we might think, from the difficult, gut-wrenching trials of life. The gospel can help us to protect ourselves against unwanted consequences, yet adversity comes to us all.

For example, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego were protected from burning to death in the fiery furnace, while Abinadi was not. John Taylor was shot and survived assassins’ bullets, while Joseph and Hyrum Smith did not. The 2,060 stripling warriors were saved from death in battle, while other righteous warriors weren’t. Some are healed from devastating illness, and some are not. Some struggle with money problems and job loss, and others don’t. Some missionaries serve with no significant health problems, yet others must return home early and even some contract illnesses, injuries, or challenges that remain with them for the rest of their mortal lives. And so forth.

In my experience, it is not good to dwell on the why or the how of these kinds of things. It doesn’t do any good to speculate when Heavenly Father has not provided a reason. “(We) cannot behold with (our) natural eyes, for the present time, the design of (our) God concerning those things which shall come hereafter, and the glory which shall follow after much tribulation. For after much tribulation come the blessings. Wherefore the day cometh that (we) shall be crowned with much glory; the hour is not yet, but is nigh at hand” (D&C 58:3-4).

What we can do, however, is to decide how we will respond to life’s difficulties and what we will make of the talents that have been given to us. (See Matthew 25:14-30.)

Elder Neal A. Maxwell taught: “The great challenge is to refuse to let the bad things that happen to us do bad things to us. That is the crucial difference between adversity and tragedy” (“But for a Small Moment,” address delivered at Brigham Young University, September 1, 1974). Our free agency is the only gift we really have that is ours to offer our Savior, and His greatest and everlasting blessings are reserved for those who do so.

Elder Dennis E. Simmons of the Seventy spoke on this point in the April 2004 general conference, in one of the best general conference talks I’ve ever heard. I may be a bit biased, as I was sitting in the choir seats behind Elder Simmons for this talk. (Elder Maxwell also spoke in that session; it was his last conference talk before he passed away.)

He said: “When Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego refused to bow down and worship a golden image set up by the king, a furious Nebuchadnezzar told them that if they would not worship as commanded, they would immediately be cast into a burning fiery furnace. ‘And who is that God that shall deliver you out of my hands?’

“The three young men quickly and confidently responded, ‘If it be so [if you cast us into the furnace], our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand.’ … But then they demonstrated that they fully understood what faith is. They continued, ‘But if not, … we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up.’ That is a statement of true faith. …

“Our God will deliver us from ridicule and persecution, but if not. … Our God will deliver us from sickness and disease, but if not. … He will deliver us from loneliness, depression, or fear, but if not. … Our God will deliver us from threats, accusations, and insecurity, but if not. … He will deliver us from death or impairment of loved ones, but if not, … we will trust in the Lord.

“Our God will see that we receive justice and fairness, but if not. … He will make sure that we are loved and recognized, but if not. … We will receive a perfect companion and righteous and obedient children, but if not, … we will have faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, knowing that if we do all we can do, we will, in His time and in His way, be delivered and receive all that He has” (“But If Not …,” April 2004 general conference).

I testify that our Heavenly Father loves us, so much so that He sent His Son, Jesus Christ, into the world to take our pains, sicknesses, and sins upon Him so that we may return to Them, safe and sound. In the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

The Gift of Inclusion

A few years ago, my sister had the keen foresight, before Dad's illness, to have him read and record the Christmas story, as found in second chapter of Luke, in a booth at the studio she where worked. Now that he has passed on, being able to listen to him read that story on Christmas Eve has become a pearl of great price for our family as we celebrate the holiday.

There are many important details in the Christmas story. Among them, I find it interesting that the Savior, who would be so sorely rejected by His own people in His earthly ministry, faced rejection on the very night of His birth. It was the infamous innkeeper on that Christmas Eve over 2,000 years ago who found no room for Joseph, Mary, and their soon-to-be-born child in the inn.

In this month's (December 2019) Ensign, the Ministering Principles article is titled "What the Christmas Story Teaches Us about Inclusion." It includes this concept:

"The innkeeper failed to make room for the Savior, but we don't have to make that mistake! We can make room for the Savior in our hearts by making room for our brothers and sisters at our tables, in our homes, and in our traditions. ...

"What better way to celebrate the Savior than to follow His example of inclusion? Remember that He invites 'all to come unto him and partake of his goodness; and he denieth none that come unto him, black and white, bond and free, male and female; and he remembereth the heathen; and all are alike unto God, both Jew and Gentile' (2 Nephi 26:33). Make room and create inclusion."


Recently, I read a number of Dad's old books now sitting on Mom's bookshelves, one of which is Elder Neal A. Maxwell's All These Things Shall Give Thee Experience. In this book, Elder Maxwell teaches the same concept:

"So often what people need is to be sheltered from the storms of life in the sanctuary of belonging. Such a service cannot be rendered by selfish people, however, because the response of the selfish will always be that there is no room in their inn. Chronic self-concern means that the 'No Vacancy' sign is always posted" (p. 55).

Experiences in both my growing up younger years and my adult years have taught me that the gift of including others is indeed a gift of the spirit, and a rare one at that. How few truly possess the ability to lift up the hands that hang low, to include others within their spheres of influence.

Growing up here in Our Lovely Deseret, I found it more common to be excluded than included by my peers. I wish I could say that has changed as an adult, but truth be told, it is not really any different. I look at the past and the present and see far more acquaintances than friends. It is not from a lack of trying. When people and/or groups continually show indifference to your efforts, it ends up not being worth the effort in the long run.

This is not to say I am lonely or entirely without friends. I'm just saying that life's experiences teach you who your friends are, largely by who shows up for things and who wants to be a part of things. The Lord has blessed me with incredible friends. They have been answers to specific prayers.

There will always be those who will exclude, I suppose. For all I know, they will go on excluding into their days in the old folks home. The thing is, I can't do anything about them. People are gonna do what they're gonna do. Their circles will stay the way they have always been.

This Christmas, and going into the new year, I am asking for the gift of inclusion. I am hoping to renew my efforts to minister to those in my family, my neighborhood, my ward, my workplace, and my community. Heaven knows there are those who need it.

Adversity

JB and I spoke in our ward's sacrament meeting earlier today. This is what I spoke on:

Good morning, brothers and sisters. I am grateful for this opportunity Jana and I have been given to speak to you today. We are so grateful for the outpouring of love and fellowship we’ve felt here since we moved in to the Stone Creek Ward five months ago.

Up until we joined this ward, I’d spent the vast majority of my adult post-mission life in singles wards. So, serving as a Webelos leader is something very new for me. I’m 42 years old, and she has been . . . let’s say 29 for a few birthdays now. We’re a bit older than most newlyweds.

Jana and I met a few years ago in our mid-singles ward, the Bountiful 8^th Ward, after it was organized in 2014. For those for whom the term mid-singles ward might sound made up: It’s a real thing for singles ages 31 through 45. Ours covered a large area, from North Salt Lake and Woods Cross up through Kaysville. Some call it the “Island of Misfit Toys,” though I like to think of it as the “remedial” singles ward. After we first met, Jana and I went on a handful of dates. It took a few years after that for me to get my head screwed on straight and to ask her out again, and after 16 months of dating and engagement, we were sealed in the Bountiful temple in April.

My topic today is adversity. When we think of adversity, we don’t have to look very far to see it all around us. We just have to step outside right now and see the smoke in the air to be reminded that firefighters in our state are currently battling some very devastating fires. We merely have to turn on the news to see images of widespread destruction caused by hurricanes, monsoons, earthquakes, and other natural disasters, “wars and rumors of wars” (Matthew 24:6), famine, shootings, domestic violence, and a number of other troubles. In addition to these troubles are the challenges of chronic physical and mental pain and illness, injury, disability, job loss, poverty, and the death of our loved ones.

For many of the people in the ward where Jana and I met, adversity comes in the form of loneliness for those remaining single into their 30s and 40s—and beyond. Sister Wendy Watson Nelson, for example, did not marry until much later in her life. There are some of ours who, sadly, may never marry in this lifetime. Still others who have married have endured the pain of the death of a spouse, infertility, wayward children, and other difficulties.’’

We live very much in a day and time when Paul prophesied: “In the last days perilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasure more than lovers of God; having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof.” Later in this chapter, Paul adds: “All that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution” (2 Timothy 3:1-5, 12).

It has always been this way for us in this mortal sphere. President Spencer W. Kimball taught: “We knew before we were born that we were coming to the earth for bodies and experience and that we would have joys and sorrows, pain and comforts, ease and hardships, health and sickness, successes and disappointments; and we knew also that we would die. We accepted all these eventualities with a glad heart eager to accept both the favorable and unfavorable. … We were willing to come and take life as it came” (Improvement Era, Mar. 1996, 217).

Elder Robert D. Hales of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles also taught: “The scriptures teach that ‘there is … opposition in all things’ (2 Ne. 2:11). Just as times of joy and happiness come to each of us, so also comes pain to every mortal. How can we understand those moments in our life when we experience physical or emotional pain? …

“I have come to understand how useless it is to dwell on the whys, what ifs, and if onlys for which there likely will be given no answers in mortality. To receive the Lord’s comfort, we must exercise faith. The questions Why me? Why our family? Why now? are usually unanswerable questions. These questions detract from our spirituality and can destroy our faith. We need to spend our time and energy building our faith by turning to the Lord and asking for strength to overcome the pains and trials of this world and to endure to the end for greater understanding” (“Healing Soul and Body,” October 1998 general conference).

In my preparation for this talk, and through studying the words and teaching of both ancient and modern prophets, I have come up with a list of four important concepts I have learned through adversity.

The first item on this list is the vital importance of keeping God’s commandments. I think it’s important to note that there is often a difference between trials and the consequences of our sins. Others’ misuse of agency may harm us. And when we sin, misusing our own agency, we must also face the consequences of those actions, becoming our own “worst enemy” or source of adversity.

In the most recent Face to Face broadcast, Elder Quentin L. Cook of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles talked about adversity and said: “Some of that (comes) because there’s agency and some of that because there’s adversary.”

King Benjamin teaches: “The natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father” (Mosiah 3:19).

Because Christ has already suffered for our sins, we do not have to suffer for them if we will turn from the natural man to Him and repent through His Atonement. Speaking of Christ, Paul tells us in the Epistle to the Hebrews: “Though he were a Son, yet he learned obedience by the things which he suffered” (Hebrews 5:8). We must learn to do the same.

President Henry B. Eyring spoke to our duty when it comes to obedience. He said: “The great test of life is to see whether we will hearken to and obey God’s commands in the midst of the storms of life. It is not to endure storms, but to choose the right while they rage” (“Spiritual Preparedness: Start Early and Be Steady,” October 2005 general conference).

It’s not possible to fully avoid adversity in this life, but we can still avoid a number of troubles by obeying gospel laws.

Second: Through adversity, we are given opportunities to grow spiritually. Trials help us to learn just what we are made of; they stretch and mold us into the kind of person Heavenly Father would like us to become.

Mother Theresa said: “I know God won’t give me anything I can’t handle. I just wish he didn’t trust me so much.”

Toward the end of the “War Chapters” in the Book of Mormon, Mormon tells us: “Because of the exceedingly great length of the war between the Nephites and the Lamanites many had become hardened, because of the exceedingly great length of the war; and many were softened because of their afflictions, insomuch that they did humble themselves before God, even in the depth of humility” (Alma 62:41).

These Saints had endured the same trial together; and while some had grown bitter, others had grown better.

Another scriptural example that comes to my mind is that of Abraham. At a very old age, he and Sarah were finally blessed with Isaac, a son born in the covenant. And yet, in what was most imaginably gut-wrenching to Abraham, he was commanded to offer up this son as a sacrifice in a test of his faith. Well, we all know what happened. Abraham and Isaac both obeyed; and at the last moment, an angel intervened to save Isaac’s life.

BYU Professor Truman G. Madsen wrote about a time when he was with President Hugh B. Brown of the First Presidency in Hebron, near Abraham’s tomb:

“I (asked President Brown), ‘Why ... was Abraham commanded to go to Mount Moriah and offer his only hope of posterity?’

“It was clear that this man, nearly ninety, had thought and prayed and wept over that question before. He finally said, ‘Abraham needed to learn something about Abraham’” (Five Classics by Truman G. Madsen [2001], 232).

Viktor Frankl, author of Man’s Search for Meaning, was imprisoned in Auschwitz concentration camp during World War II. Even under such wretched conditions, he later wrote that people could nevertheless still decide what their attitudes would be: “We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way."

Thirdly, adversity gives us an opportunity to serve and minister to our fellow man.

In the Sermon on the Mount, the Savior taught: “Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hid. Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven” (Matthew 5:14-16).

Whenever and wherever a natural disaster occurs, members of the Church are always among the first ones there to help. A few years ago, following a hurricane in the Southern states, I remember reading about a cleanup effort the Church had headed. One very grateful woman was quoted as saying that she was especially grateful to two groups in particular for their help: the Latter-day Saints and the Mormons.

I very much feel for those who have been affected by Hurricane Florence recently, because I have been where they’ve been. When I was 13 years old, my family and I lived in Puerto Rico, where we weathered one of the worst storms ever to occur to that date. (Last year’s Hurricane Maria was much worse.)

Hurricane Hugo pummeled our island, and it went on to destroy other areas of the Caribbean and southeastern United States. Following the widespread destruction, we surveyed the damage, and it was extensive. It was at this time that I gained a testimony of the importance of heeding the prophets’ counsel to store a year-long supply of food, clean water, batteries, and other necessities, because we would desperately need them in the ensuing weeks.

What good can come of such a catastrophe? On the surface, it’s hard to say. The lives lost can’t be restored nor the extensive damage undone. But to give one example, I recall a cleanup service project I took part in with the youth in my ward. We went to a nearby park to clean up and carry away the fallen branches and leaves, to mow the grass, and other tasks. As we worked, residents of this neighborhood, most likely none of whom were of our faith, noticed what we were doing, and a few came out to help us. A few others brought us soda and snacks. They learned we were there representing our Church. It may have been the first contact with the Church they’d had in their lives, and we hoped it was a positive one. It certainly was a memorable one for me.

We have multiple opportunities to help bear each other’s burdens here, today, in Bountiful, Utah. There is much of pain and suffering that we can help alleviate when we look at those in need here in our neighborhoods and communities, at our workplaces, in our families, and in our very own homes. There are numerous chances to find those we can serve as we seek for and follow promptings through the Holy Ghost.

Fourth: Enduring adversity helps us to develop Christlike qualities of love, compassion, and empathy for others.

In his book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Dr. Stephen Covey tells the story of being on a train one day, where he found himself annoyed by two very noisy kids causing a disturbance to everyone around them. He noticed that the father was doing nothing about them. After a moment of restraint, he approached the father. Here’s Dr. Covey’s account of what happened next:

“Sir, your children are really disturbing a lot of people. I wonder if you couldn’t control them a little more?

“The man lifted his gaze as if to come to a consciousness of the situation for the first time and said softly, ‘Oh, you’re right. I guess I should do something about it. We just came from the hospital where their mother died about an hour ago. I don’t know what to think, and I guess they don’t know how to handle it either.’

“Can you imagine what I felt at that moment? My paradigm shifted. Suddenly I saw things differently, I felt differently, I behaved differently. My irritation vanished. I didn’t have to worry about controlling my attitude or my behavior; my heart was filled with the man’s pain. Feelings of sympathy and compassion flowed freely. Everything changed in an instant.”

Along these same lines, President Eyring shared what he said was some of the best advice he’d ever been given: “When you meet someone, treat them as if they were in serious trouble, and you will be right more than half the time” (“In the Strength of the Lord,” April 2004 general conference).

Or, in the words of one of my favorite hymns of the Church: “In the quiet heart is hidden sorrow that the eyes can’t see” (Hymns, no. 220, “Lord, I Would Follow Thee”).

A few years ago, while I was looking for a new place to live, I had a few leads to move in with some friends; and yet I had the distinct impression I needed to move back in with my parents for a short while. It was not long after this that I learned one big reason, perhaps, I may have felt this impression: My father was diagnosed with dementia. It was astonishing to observe how quickly this illness took its toll on both his mind and on his body. Over the ensuing 18 months, I learned a great deal about patience, charity, and humility as I watched him suffer.

In the process, I was given a great gift: this small window of precious time, time I now look back upon as sacred, to give back to my father some of what he had given me all of my life before then. It was in simple things like driving him to get his hair cut or taking him out to lunch. It was mostly through just spending time sitting by him and talking to him as we watched sports on TV.

It’s been said that the only two guarantees in life are death and taxes. Well, after enduring his illness as well as anyone could have, Dad died on April 15 last year. On that final day of his mortal life, I was granted one additional blessing—a tender mercy to me—in the form of a spiritual prompting. By this point, Dad’s motor skills had deteriorated to the point he could not even walk around on his own, and we were forced to put him in a home where he could be cared for. He would be there for just nine days.

The next day was Easter, so my thought initially was to buy him some Easter candy that Saturday and then to bring it to him on Easter Sunday, when I could spend more time with him. Instead, the prompting was to go and see him that afternoon and not to delay. For one last moment, I got to visit with Dad, to embrace him and to tell him one last time that I love him. Jana and I had just begun dating at this time, and she felt the same prompting.

Just a few, short hours later, the phone call came that Dad had been rushed to the hospital in cardiac arrest. By the time we arrived in the emergency room, he was gone. And yet, in the confusion and the chaos, I was at peace. I was comforted. Though I was deeply saddened to lose him, and I still miss him today, I became reacquainted with the Comforter that night and in the days and weeks that would follow.

When my siblings and my mother and I left the hospital, it was past midnight and it had become Easter Sunday. The timing of it all was, in my mind, no coincidence. It was a blessed reminder from a loving Heavenly Father that He is in control. Because of Easter and a loving Savior—“dearly, dearly has he loved!” (Hymns, no. 194, “There Is a Green Hill Far Away”), as we sang in the sacrament hymn—Dad lives on, and I will have the chance to embrace him again.

Perspective is an extraordinary blessing. Elder Orson F. Whitney of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught: “No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude, and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God, ... and it is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire” (Improvement Era, Mar. 1966, 211).

How grateful I am for the Atonement of Jesus Christ, which encompasses so many griefs and woes and strengthens us to endure the crosses we are called to bear in this life, whichever crosses they may be.

Elder Neal A. Maxwell of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught: “Trying to comprehend the trials and meaning of this life without understanding Heavenly Father’s marvelously encompassing plan of salvation is like trying to understand a three-act play while seeing only the second act. Fortunately, our knowledge of the Savior, Jesus Christ, and His Atonement helps us to endure our trials and to see purpose in suffering and to trust God for what we cannot comprehend.

“Revealed truths reassure us that we are enclosed in divine empathy. As Enoch witnessed, we worship a God who wept over needless human misery and wickedness (see Moses 7:28-29, 33, 37). Jesus’ perfect empathy was ensured when, along with His Atonement for our sins, He took upon Himself our sicknesses, sorrows, griefs, and infirmities and came to know these ‘according to the flesh’ (Alma 7:11-12). He did this in order that He might be filled with perfect, personal mercy and empathy and thereby know how to succor us in our infirmities. He thus fully comprehends human suffering. Truly Christ ‘descended below all things, in that He comprehended all things’ (D&C 88:6). …

“Part of enduring well consists of being meek enough, amid our suffering, to learn from our relevant experiences. Rather than simply passing through these things, they must pass through us and do so in ways which sanctify these experiences for our good (see D&C 122:7). Thereby, our empathy, too, is enriched and everlasting” (“Enduring Well,” April 1997 general conference).

I add my testimony his. I testify that we have an all-wise, all-knowing, all-loving Savior who shows us how to love as He did. President Russell M. Nelson leads His Church on Earth today. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

No Fooling

One of the last movies I saw in the theater before leaving on my mission (in case you've not been keeping up with Paco Nation, I'm old, folks), was Forrest Gump, and I went to see it with Mom. *SPOILER ALERT* After Jenny's death and the very somber ending, Mom turned to me as the credits began to roll and said, "I wish I could introduce them (presumably Forrest and Forrest Jr.) to the missionaries right at that moment."

This is just the kind of person Mom was and is. That's how her mind works.

Fast forward to earlier this week when, on my day off work, and while recovering from a bout of the Martian Death Flu, I watched the last few episodes of "Parenthood," a TV drama I did not watch when it originally ran on TV but which I've been following over the past few months on Netflix. In the final episode, which may be one of the all-around greatest TV episodes and finales ever produced, so many things wrapped around my heart like an anaconda, and I was bawling like a baby during the final 15 or 20 minutes. *SPOILER ALERT* What hit home most was (1) the grandfather/patriarch of the family passing away and (2) Sarah's and Hank's wedding, which was beautifully done. Most if not all of the main characters' (and even some of the supporting characters') story lines also wrapped up rather well in the process.

JB and I are in the middle of our own wedding preparations as I write this. So, of course, my brain goes there only several hundred times each day right now. It's getting real at this point. I picked up my suit just a few days ago. This is actually happening, I have to keep reminding myself. So, my heart was there with Sarah and Hank as they tied the knot.

Beyond that, though: As the four adult children and widow grieved for their departed father, I went mentally and spiritually where Mom went with the ending of Forrest Gump. Basically, I wanted to hug them and tell them: I've been where you've been. I've lost my father, too. I know your heartache. But I also know the peace, "which passeth all understanding," that only the gospel brings. This life is not the end. You can see him again!

I'm incredibly grateful for the gospel plan by which families can be sealed not for this life only but for eternity, as well, if we are faithful and give our whole souls to the great gospel plan. Because of it and because of our Savior's sacrifice, this incredible blessing is ours for the asking. And unlike the plots of both Forrest Gump and "Parenthood," this concept isn't just a neat story. It's not just something that makes me smile when I am down or a good idea. Though today is also April Fool's Day, it is most certainly no joke. It's everything! And it's what keeps me going day by day.

It being Easter Sunday, I'm reminded that Dad passed away last year just a few, short hours before the dawn of Easter morning 2017. Though it's not chronologically been a year yet, it was still last Easter, and this Easter brings with it memories of that sorrowful night. It also brings with it a reminder of the truly great gift the Savior gave to us all.

Never Really Gone

With only 13(!) days remaining in the year 2017, I look back today at the year that was. And I'm amazed at what an incredible year it's been and just how much can change in only 365 days.

Paco hasn't blogged all that much this year, as a friend pointed out to me earlier today. Other than putting up a number of family photos (really one of the most important things I think I could do) and "postcard" posts, that is. This is true. Hopefully, a lack of original blogging this year has been at the expense of a greater good in my day-to-day life.

I have had my new job for almost a year now, one I was searching for a year ago at this time. I'm free from debt (knock on wood). I have done a lot more improv and have expanded my horizons, performing with new people in my troupe (while others have moved on), and like two snowflakes, no two performances have yet been the same. I even got out of town for a rare weekend for someone who doesn't take many vacations these days; yes, I even made it to the Idaho side of Bear Lake!

Every day, I wake up, get out of bed, and accomplish daily tasks, while working on monthly and yearly goals. I am reminded of the great blessing inherent in this simple fact. Goodreads just reminded me that I have read 27 books in 2017 (which will be 28 by week's end), or approximately one book every two weeks. One of those books was the Book of Mormon, which I have now read . . . I don't know how many times. I began this latest read-through in February and completed it in October.

I was involved in two car accidents in July and September, neither one my fault: rear-ended both times. I am incredibly grateful I was not injured any worse than I was (whiplash only). My car, however, required nearly $3,000 in repairs.

Like the citizens in Whoville who cry out to Horton: "I am here!" I'm still breathing. I am still ticking. In spite of the challenges I face and those I have overcome, as well as those yet to be overcome, I am grateful to be here.

Oh, and the most significant happenings of the year have occurred family wise. First and foremost, I have a fiancée(!) with whom I'd gone out on two dates a year ago today. How did I get here? How did I ever get to be so richly blessed? I may not learn the answers for a while yet. Still, it's yet another reason my heart is full of gratitude at this holiday season and my cup runneth over.

In the past three months, I've been blessed with two new nephews. The nibling count is up to 14! They are the most amazing kids an uncle could ask for.

Last but not certainly not least, one of the most important happenings of the year 2017: We lost Dad in April after a lengthy battle with dementia. Earlier today, I drove past the place where I last saw him in this mortal sphere. On that day, I had the chance to spend some time with him, embrace him, and tell him once again, "I love you." Within a few, short hours, he was gone. I will be forever grateful for the prompting to go and see him that day, to not put it off until another time.

The jogging of that memory saddened me once again for a brief moment today. We recently had our first Thanksgiving in which his chair was empty. Just a couple of weeks ago, his namesake, Tanner Brent, was given his name and blessing. And now we are in the midst of our first Christmas season without Dad. For me, the wound is a bit fresh still.

Also today, I found myself reflecting on a scene in Star Wars: The Last Jedi, which I saw for a second time (there will definitely be a few more in the coming weeks; go figure!) last night.

STOP READING HERE IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE MOVIE YET AND DON'T WANT TO READ WHAT MAY BE A MINOR SPOILER.

When Luke visits Leia, and he hands her a trinket of Han's that hung in the Millennium Falcon, he reminds her that those we love who depart our mortal existence are "ever really gone."

THIS IS THE POINT AT WHICH THE POTENTIAL SPOILER ENDS AND YOU MAY KEEP READING IF YOU WISH.

When I returned home from completing various tasks today, there was this incredibly beautiful poem on the doorstep, gifted by one of our neighbors down the street:

The girl who delivered this, I am told, lost her own mother when just three months old, after which, just a couple of years ago, she also lost her stepmother to cancer. I believe this girl is wise beyond her years. I'm speechless at this incredible gesture.

Without trying to sound too much like Linus in "A Charlie Brown Christmas," that's really what this Christmas season is all about; that those we lose, because of the holy child born in Bethlehem, are never really gone. And that is basically the greatest gift we could ever receive from an all-wise, all-loving Father in Heaven. With the birth of this baby is the gentle reminder that death, too, is part of the plan.

One day, we, too, will each spend our first Christmas with the Lord. In the meantime, I'm grateful to spend this one with all of you, to "have . . . a merry little Christmas now."

"And so, as Tiny Tim observed: God bless us, every one!"

Death, Taxes, and Other Sure Things

I recently gave a talk in church. The occasion, in case you hadn't guessed from my recent posts, was Dad's funeral. Here is what I spoke about:

There is an old saying that the only sureties in life are death and taxes. Well, Dad passed away April 15.

Dad had a great sense of humor. But in all seriousness, and in the few minutes I have today, I'd like to talk about some of the most important things he gave me (besides nearsightedness and the bald spot):

1) Time. President Dieter F. Uchtdorf taught: "In family relationships, love is really spelled T-I-M-E." Dad gave us his time, and he was thoroughly invested in our lives. Whether it was yelling from the sidelines as a coach or just an anxious parent, he was there at our basketball and soccer games and hardly ever missed one. He supported us in our hobbies and interests. We knew he cared, and his love language was the time he gave.

2) Work. Dad taught us to work. The plowboy who grew up on a farm in Smithfield and learned the value of an honest day's labor taught his children that you don't get something for nothing and you have to work for it. We were given an allowance, but we had to do our chores (weeding, mowing the lawn, etc.) to earn it. For years, we had a paper route, waking up at 5:00 or 5:30 a.m. even on school days and holidays, and he worked right alongside us, never taking a cent for himself. Those lessons carried me through part-time jobs in high school and college and into the present.

3) He taught me five simple words that stand out: excuse me, please, and thank you. I vividly remember him teaching me to use these words when I was growing up. Good manners were and are important. Knowing and using these words have helped me open countless doors in my daily interactions with people and my work experience.

Though Dad passed on a Saturday night, as a family we left the hospital when it was already Sunday morning. Easter Sunday! The timing of it all, we think, was not a coincidence. And the most important message in the world is still, as the Prophet Joseph Smith described, that Jesus Christ "died, was buried, and rose again the third day, and ascended into heaven; and all other things which pertain to our religion are only appendages to it."

In a world rife with "fake news," rumors of wars, fads that come and go, the philosophies of men, and other false Christs the prophets saw would be abundant in our day, my knowledge of the Atonement and Resurrection of Jesus Christ is, in addition to death and taxes, the third sure thing in my life; and not only do I believe it, but I also know it through the Holy Spirit.

In the New Testament, Paul said that "this thing (the gospel) was not done in a corner" (Acts 26:26), and Peter spoke of the world's "cunningly devised fables" (2 Peter 1:16). Elder Jeffrey R. Holland recently spoke on "cunningly devised fables" in his Face 2 Face event:

"This is not a cunningly devised fable. This is God's truth. I want all of you here and afar to know that I know that this is the work and kingdom of God on earth. I am more certain of that than anything I know, anything I have seen, anything I have ever heard, and anything I hope to embrace in the future."

Today, I echo what he taught. When we talk of the concepts of resurrection and eternal families, not only are these good or neat ideas; I testify that they are true! And that knowledge carries me at this time and will carry me in future days.

In an all-wise, all-loving Heavenly Father's magnificent plan, there is so much more in store for us than wearing halos and playing harps in heaven! He has so much more in store for us, and it is beautiful and wonderful to think of. Death is a necessary part of that plan. Though we mourn today, we also rejoice.

Paul said: "For now we see through a glass, darkly" (1 Corinthians 13:12). I know that Dad now sees clearly. I take great hope in the knowledge that he is reunited with his parents, my Uncle Dexter, and other loved ones who have gone on before.

Dad was sick for a long time. Some of his thorns in the flesh he carried for all of his life on Earth. He is now free of them. I don't know why Dad had to suffer through those nor the illness that ultimately claimed his mortal life. (How can any of us know for sure why these things happen while "we see through a glass, darkly"?)

Neverthless, like Nephi, though "I do not know the meaning of all things," "I know that he (God) loveth his children." I know that (1) our Heavenly Father loved Dad and (2) Dad loved his children and his grandchildren.

I testify of the importance of the gift of the Holy Ghost. His presence has been so important to me over the past week. When we got the call that Dad had been taken to the hospital, I felt urgency to get there, and yet I also felt peace. I feel at peace today. The Spirit, also known as the Comforter, has comforted when I have been sad, and He has given me also joy in the knowledge of these things, of which I testify in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

A Holly Jolly Christmas

The older I get, and the more Christmases I experience, the more I realize that the joy I felt growing up didn't go anywhere, and it didn't disappear; it is still there, albeit in a different way. It is reborn in the next generation. I see my nieces and nephews open their gifts with wide-eyed wonder and see the gratitude expressed both in those who give and receive, and this warms my heart and soul.

Such was the case Saturday night, as the Plowmans (and Woodsens) gathered to celebrate Christmas Eve together. Steve put together a very nice Christmas program for us all. We are especially grateful that Grandma was with us to bear her testimony of Christ and His divine mission, as it looked like something not necessarily guaranteed all that long ago.

It was eight-month-old Graham's first Christmas (seen here with his 11-year-old cousin Luke):

It wasn't a pink rabbit suit, but Kylee still loved her panda pajamas:

Jackson was over the moon with his Minecraft LEGO set:

And Kira was the same about her presents:

I hope that you all enjoyed a wonderful holiday season (which, by the way, continues through January 5, the real twelfth day of Christmas). And if 2016 has been a rough year for you (it has been for me in the form of my own challenges), I hope that 2017 dawns all the brighter. I'm a big fan of new beginnings. If I can help make that happen for you, I'm here to do what I can. That, I feel, is one of the most important lessons the baby born in Bethlehem came here to teach us.

Land of the Free

"Given this land
If they live
Righteously."

 -"Book of Mormon Stories" (emphasis added)

We're hearing that word a lot about the United States of America today, being Independence Day. And rightly we should! We should be very proud of her today, on her 240th birthday.

Nevertheless, I have observed that not everyone out there is exactly proud of this country. Have you found that the people who complain about things here in this country are, with few exceptions, largely those who have never traveled outside of its borders? I have. Thanks to social media expanding all of our scopes of view, we're often hearing that we're (collectively) racist, evil, and that people who don't have the rights they should are still lacking those rights.

Granted, we have a handful of people in our country who are making a bad name for the rest of us out there. There are also secret combinations, just as the Book of Mormon warned us about, in the government, the media, and other places. But honestly I shudder when we're called these horrible names as a whole.

Meanwhile, much of the rest of the world faces terrorism on a daily basis, isn't free to speak its mind or to worship according to the dictates of its own conscience, and faces real, dangerous, largely unchecked bigotry in the form of women who are not allowed to sneeze without a man present and homosexuals and Christians both who are jailed, thrown off of rooftops, or are put to death in other horrific ways.

It's a nutty world out there, and you only have to look on the daily newscast to see just how insane things are.

Having traveled to a number of foreign countries and having lived in another for years myself, I am very grateful for just how good we really do have things here. During my time in Peru, I was first shocked to observe people call out racially charged things in my direction as I walked down the street each day, and then I just got used to it. And like my previous statement about the few giving a bad name to the whole, this was certainly the case; though I don't know of a single place here in my home state of Utah where you will walk down the streets in fear of a similar thing happening.

Just look around you. Where some see prison cells, I see freedom and liberty.

But can freedom be too much freedom?

Elder D. Todd Christofferson of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, in a speech last week on religious freedom, taught:

"We are in the middle of a rights revolution. Sometimes the alleged new rights are important to correct injustices. But sometimes these supposed rights are little more than demands that government forces others to conform to society's new moral preferences."

To follow up on my previous post, another of the many reasons I preach the restored gospel of Christ, as revealed by living prophets and Apostles, is because possession of this land comes with a promise contingent on our behavior:

"This is a choice land, and whatsoever nation shall possess it shall be free from bondage, and from captivity, and from all other nations under heaven, if they will but serve the God of the land, who is Jesus Christ, who hath been manifested by the things which we have written" (Ether 2:12; emphasis added).

We can see what happened to the Jaredites and Nephites who broke this covenant. What will happen to us?

Let us never take our freedom for granted by always striving to choose the right. Ultimately, we cannot have our rights without righteousness.

My Soul's Complaint

"He lives to comfort me when faint.

He lives to hear my soul's complaint."

 -"I Know That My Redeemer Lives," Hymn no. 136

We sang these very words not long ago, as Latter-day Saints are wont to do in our meetings. It's one of our most common and most beloved hymns, though I don't think I've ever really stopped to ponder much about this particular phrase. It was later pointed our by our elders quorum instructor, which then led to a rather interesting discussion.

Again, as Latter-day Saints are wont to do. Especially in elders quorum.

Complaining to the Lord? You mean, He lives to hear me moan and groan when things go poorly, or when I'm heartbroken or lonely, or when my faith is not a strong as it would or could be? He puts up with all of that?

Apparently so. It is a somewhat reassuring thought. In our deepest, darkest moments of despair and trial, He is there, and He understands, because He has walked where we have walked and Has felt what we have felt. I think He gets it if we have moments even when we doubt everything we once thought we knew to be true. We can only imagine the loneliness, isolation, pain, and anxiety He felt when He cried out, in the moment of His deepest despair:

"My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?" (Matthew 27:46).

What's the difference between complaining and murmuring? I think there is one, though it may be a fine line sometimes. I also Googled this very question and read a number of intriguing responses, mainly on other Christian Web sites and blogs.

Personally, I believe that murmurers have gone beyond merely complaining. They are not only complainers as a habit, but they are in open rebellion; not because they have doubts, but because they choose not to believe.

Then again, it may be just semantics. Po-tay-to, po-tah-to, and all that.

This is not also to say, at the same time, that it's a good thing to be primarily a complainer. Because complainers are not only miserable people; since misery loves company, they love to pass it around.

This topic has been on my mind lately because my family has lost from this earthly existence two souls very dear to us this week; one on each side of my family. If I get to the afterlife and find neither one of them there (one was a member who shared our faith, while the other, one of the most giving and loving souls I've ever known, was not), I'll know I've ended up in the wrong place. Both were unexpected, though one was far less expected than the other due to age and health circumstances. Whatever the reasons or expectations may have been a week ago, we feel the loss dearly, and we mourn and grieve.

To some extent, our souls even complain. We may wonder why things happened the way they did. Personally, I wonder what to say that doesn't sound forced or stupid or uncaring. I always do when death is involved, for it is never an easy topic.

What I do know is that He is there to hear our soul's complaint. He understands. He loves us. In the end, He will make everything all right, even though all may be noise and confusion and chaos right here and now in this mortal coil.

Indeed, the He lives portion of the "He lives to hear my soul's complaint" is the most important part of that phrase.

Joyful and Triumphant

Another great Christmas holiday is in the books! To celebrate this wondrous holiday and the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ, the family gathered for our annual Christmas dinner and pageant on Christmas Eve.

The food was delicious and plentiful, and once again my sister put together a fantastic Christmas pageant program, which included music by Ben and Jenna on the violin, Steve on the guitar, and Jessica on the piano and a duet by Dave and Kira.

Jackson, who had seen Star Wars: The Force Awakens for the first time Tuesday night and was very excited about the movie, created this for me out of LEGO bricks:

Jackson wasn't the only one whose mind was on Star Wars. Biz tells me that nine-month-old Kate picked out this beanie for me at the store and would not let go of it:

As for that weird kind of depression that sets in on the morning of Boxing Day when you realize that Christmas is over for another year? Save it for January 6th, because December 25th is actually the first day of Christmas and not the twelfth. In the meantime, I reserve the right to wear my Christmas socks and listen to holiday tunes through Three Kings Day.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

Walkin' in a Winter Wonderland, Alone

"It's been a long time, been a long time,
Been a long lonely, lonely, lonely, lonely, lonely time."
 -Led Zeppelin, "Rock and Roll"

The holidays are all about either enjoying the chilly outdoors together with a loved one ("Walkin' in a Winter Wonderland") or staying indoors together with a loved one because it's chilly outdoors ("Baby, It's Cold Outside"). Well, that's what my radio tells me ad nauseum each night as I drift off to sleep. Eventually.

Why are the holidays such a tough time for many singles? For many, it's because of songs like these aforementioned ones, which remind them just what they lack. It's the season of giving and receiving, and one of the greatest gifts of all somehow seems to elude them. Also, Hallmark movies, which convey sort of the same message.

This topic has been on my mind this holiday season because, well, the holidays just don't seem to really get any easier for those of us on the Island of Misfit Toys. You'd think it would get easier with time. But it never seems to.

Some fill the void by throwing themselves into their work, their hobbies, social events with friends, or a combination of these things. Even social media seems like a substitute for companionship. Others face rejection, and then give up completely. They withdraw and become hardened or stop trying to move forward.

At times, I have been all of these people.

And then there's my family member who has had a very tough month. I last wrote about this person on Thanksgiving Day here on Paco Nation. We've all hoped and prayed things would get better.

They haven't.

I visited this person last week for the first time at this person's new place of residence, where treatment is ongoing. I meant to stop by for at least an hour, but I ended up staying for three. This person plead with me to stay there until it was time for bed.

Loneliness comes in so many forms.

All of this was on my mind last week when I attended the First Presidency Christmas Devotional down at the Conference Center. Thank goodness I had the opportunity to go. It was comforting to me personally to hear President Dieter F. Uchtdorf remind us all about the One for whom we celebrate Christmas:

"He saves us from loneliness, emptiness, and unworthiness. He opens our eyes and our ears. He transforms darkness to light, grief to hope, and loneliness to love."

I need saving from all three of those things. In some ways, I still need my eyes and ears opened. It was a concept that was exactly what I needed to hear at that moment.

Does that instantly make it all better? No. But it helps me to remember what matters most at this time. It teaches me that while the pain, suffering, and grief of this life are in fact temporary, so is loneliness.

That thought alone may get me through New Year's, at least.

Good Things to Come

I hope everyone enjoyed their Thanksgiving holiday today and, where possible, you were able to spend at least some time with family members or friends.

As for me, it is an odd-numbered year (i.e. 2015), so it is a year when all of my siblings go to the in-laws' for Turkey Day. That is partly why I ended up eating my piece of pumpkin pie in a hospital room.

It wasn't what I had planned on nor where I wanted to be, but then again, nobody at that hospital wanted to be there—the other visitors, the nurses, and the patients especially.

Someone in my family is sick right now. Out of respect to this person and the condition being battled, I do not get any more specific than that at this time. Suffice me to say, for now, that this person wanted to be in this hospital room less than anyone else there and asked multiple times to be taken home.

It is not possible at the moment. Not today. But we hope and pray that that day will come soon.

Over the course of a very anxious week, we have been doing a lot of hoping and praying. None has been more stressed or worried than Mom.

I am not the one who tends to be optimistic in these situations. Nevertheless, a familiar quote from President Gordon B. Hinckley keeps running through my head:

"Don't worry. I say that to myself every morning. It will all work out. If you do your best, it will all work out. Put your trust in God, and move forward with faith and confidence in the future. The Lord will not forsake us. . . . If we will put our trust in Him, if we will pray to Him, if we will live worthy of His blessings, He will hear our prayers."

How exactly it will all work out remains to be seen right now. But in the Lord's due time, it will all be OK. There is always hope when we put our trust in the High Priest of good things to come.

Sometimes, the lessons on gratitude are not totally lost.

The Sacrifice of All Things

Since last week's announcement about the handbook update and the new policy regarding same-sex couples and their children, social media is ablaze once again. Quite understandably, there are some very strong feelings about this matter on both sides of the issue. I don't really need to go into the details, because I'm sure you know them by now, but in case you were pearl diving in the South Pacific and somehow missed it, Elder Christofferson explains the change and the rationale behind it in this interview here.

I have pondered a great deal about what to write about on this subject. The more I have studied it, the more I see the wisdom in the change and the great deal of thought, prayer, and inspiration that are behind it.

Nevertheless, I fully realize that, for others, including many members of the Church, the reaction is the polar opposite. The announcement has really thrown them for a loop and has caused confusion, doubt, and anger.

The scriptures and events from Church history are replete with heart-wrenching, defining moments in which people were asked to do things that shook the very ground they walked on. Consider Abraham's commandment to sacrifice his only son, Isaac; Daniel facing the lion's den; Alma and Amulek being forced to watch their converts being burned alive; the commandment for some latter-day leaders to obey the law of polygamy (which caused Brigham Young to look at a funeral casket and wish he were in it); and many others.

The greatest, most important example, of course, was our Savior, who plead in agony: "Remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done" (Luke 22:42).

Each was tested to core but, at the same time, each obeyed because they clung to a vital truth that was taught by the Prophet Joseph Smith:

"A religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things never has the power sufficient to produce the faith necessary unto life and salvation."

The sacrifices we make and will have to make are likely not going to be on such a grand scale as the aforementioned examples, though there are those among us who live under very difficult circumstances, be they mental, emotional, spiritual, or physical. Certainly, no one can know the extent of the Savior's infinite sacrifice for us all nor will have to endure that kind of suffering.

However, my point is that, sometimes, what it all boils down to is that the most important thing we are asked to sacrifice is the only thing that is really ours to give: our will. We are asked to sacrifice our pride, our natural man instincts, or our inclination to disbelieve, criticize, or murmur. We are asked to believe, or to plant to seed to believe even if we can't believe right now. We are asked to support and sustain even when we don't fully understand the reasons why as we see through our natural eyes. Our father Adam sacrificed because he didn't know the reasons but he knew that he had been commanded by the Lord.

In a 1978 speech, Elder Neal A. Maxwell taught: "In the months and years ahead, events will require of each member that he or she decide whether or not he or she will follow the First Presidency. Members will find it more difficult to halt longer between two opinions."

I believe that this is one of those moments of decision for some among us.

Having said all that, I am also troubled by comments from a few Church members about the policy change. To those who are struggling with this news, they have said: "If you don't like it, leave."

This sentiment should not exist among those who profess to follow Christ. Our Savior invited all who were burdened all to come unto Him and to find rest to their souls.

To any reading this who may be considering leaving the Church, whatever the reasons, I plead with you: Stay. The Church needs you. I need you. And you need the Church. If you have concerns or worries, it is okay to have them, and there is a way to resolve them. Pray. Read the scriptures. Meditate. Re-read a conference talk. Counsel with your bishop. If not him, talk to someone else you trust. Talk to me, and I will listen. Ponderize. Or tenderize. Do whatever you need to do to figure things out, and take the time you need to do so.

After all, the reason we have this church is because a young man had doubts, agonized over them, and prayed about them.

Remember this counsel of President Hinckley: "Be believing, be happy, don't get discouraged. Things will work out."

If we seek out the Lord's will and have the courage to act upon the answers, I believe that things will, indeed, work out.