How the Gospel Protects Me

Today at church in our new ward, JB and I were asked to speak in sacrament meeting. What follows below is the text of my talk.

My topic today is: “How living the gospel of Jesus Christ protects my family.”

I think many of the most powerful sermons are taught in the Primary songs. I love the messages they convey. They are simple, direct, and powerful.

In the Primary song (and in Hymn no. 303), we sing:

“Keep the commandments; keep the commandments!

In this there is safety; in this there is peace.

He will send blessings; He will send blessings.

Words of a prophet: Keep the commandments.

In this there is safety and peace.”

There is protection in keeping the commandments. When we keep the commandments, our Heavenly Father sends the blessings we can claim by no other means than by choosing to obey Him. It teaches us to be truly happy, because “wickedness never was happiness” (Alma 41:10). The adversary would have us choose poorly and even become addicted to things that would take away our free agency and will make us miserable.

When we make mistakes and break a commandment, however, there is protection in repentance through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. When we come to our Heavenly Father in humility and prayer, how long does it take for the Atonement to take effect in our lives? Alma answers this question in Alma 34:

“Now is the time and the day of your salvation; and therefore, if ye will repent and harden not your hearts, immediately shall the great plan of redemption be brought about unto you” (Alma 34:31; emphasis added).

The Atonement will begin to work in our lives just as soon as we ask for it! Immediately the Savior’s healing process begins.

In another Primary song, we sing: “The wise man built his house upon the rock” (Children’s Songbook, no. 281).

In Helaman chapter 5, Helaman teaches us about this rock:

“Remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall.”

Christ will help us to weather the storms of this life. Sometimes, the storm can be quite literally an actual storm. When I was 13 years old, I lived with my family on the island of Puerto Rico. When I first learned that Hurricane Hugo was headed our way, I was terrified. I’d never been through anything like this before. But we were prepared. The prophets had long taught (and are still teaching) us to prepare for calamities with food storage, including also a first aid kit, clean water, clothing, batteries, etc. As the storm approached, the store shelves became emptied and bare as others panicked and rushed to buy what they would need to get them through the next days and weeks. But we never had to worry about that. All around us there was destruction, but we were OK. Our community and our island rebuilt. Home teachers ensured we were doing well and had everything we needed.

In yet another Primary song, we sing: “Mine is a home where every hour is blessed by the strength of priesthood pow’r” (Children’s Songbook, no. 190). The priesthood can bless not only our homes but every aspect of our lives. Through priesthood ordinances, we make covenants with our Heavenly Father that will protect us as we journey through life.

Elder Dale G. Renlund of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles has taught:

“By making and keeping temple covenants, we learn more about the Lord’s purposes and receive a fulness of the Holy Ghost. We receive direction for our lives. We mature in our discipleship so that we do not remain perpetual, unknowing children. Rather, we live with an eternal perspective and are more motivated to serve God and others. We receive increased capacity to fulfill our purposes in mortality. We are protected from evil, and we gain greater power to resist temptation and to repent when we stumble. When we falter, the memory of our covenants with God helps us return to the path. … Ultimately, our destinies are changed because the covenant path leads to exaltation and eternal life.

“Keeping covenants made in baptismal fonts and in temples also provides us with strength to withstand mortality’s trials and heartaches” (“Accessing God’s Power through Covenants,” April 2023 general conference).

The gift of the Holy Ghost is indeed one of our Father in Heaven’s greatest blessings and a source of protection. He warns us of danger and reminds us of what is good and true. The Comforter has accompanied me when I have experienced the loss of loved ones, including most recently my dear mother, who passed away this past November. In the days and weeks that followed her death, I became reacquainted with the Comforter in ways I never expected. I love her and will always miss her, but I am at peace because of His comfort. I testify that He is real.

The gospel of Jesus Christ protects us in so many other ways, both temporally as well as spiritually. The Word of Wisdom, for example, protects us from many avoidable illnesses, including freedom from addiction to harmful substances. The law of chastity helps us to avoid unnecessary pain and suffering and things that would poison our minds and spirits. Tithing and fast offerings help us learn to be less selfish while also bringing with them specific blessings of a financial nature. In my previous calling in our last ward, I had the privilege to see up close on a weekly basis how our bishop used fast offering funds to help people in our ward in numerous ways. It never ceased to amaze me what good could be done.

I love how devoted the Church is to helping us succeed in every aspect of our lives. From self-reliance, job training, and money management classes to LDS Social Services, including mental health and addiction recovery counseling, to its welfare and humanitarian projects, the Church helps us to make of ourselves the best disciples we can be.

One final thought before I close:  Though the gospel protects us from many things, we may not always be “protected,” at least not in the way we might think, from the difficult, gut-wrenching trials of life. The gospel can help us to protect ourselves against unwanted consequences, yet adversity comes to us all.

For example, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego were protected from burning to death in the fiery furnace, while Abinadi was not. John Taylor was shot and survived assassins’ bullets, while Joseph and Hyrum Smith did not. The 2,060 stripling warriors were saved from death in battle, while other righteous warriors weren’t. Some are healed from devastating illness, and some are not. Some struggle with money problems and job loss, and others don’t. Some missionaries serve with no significant health problems, yet others must return home early and even some contract illnesses, injuries, or challenges that remain with them for the rest of their mortal lives. And so forth.

In my experience, it is not good to dwell on the why or the how of these kinds of things. It doesn’t do any good to speculate when Heavenly Father has not provided a reason. “(We) cannot behold with (our) natural eyes, for the present time, the design of (our) God concerning those things which shall come hereafter, and the glory which shall follow after much tribulation. For after much tribulation come the blessings. Wherefore the day cometh that (we) shall be crowned with much glory; the hour is not yet, but is nigh at hand” (D&C 58:3-4).

What we can do, however, is to decide how we will respond to life’s difficulties and what we will make of the talents that have been given to us. (See Matthew 25:14-30.)

Elder Neal A. Maxwell taught: “The great challenge is to refuse to let the bad things that happen to us do bad things to us. That is the crucial difference between adversity and tragedy” (“But for a Small Moment,” address delivered at Brigham Young University, September 1, 1974). Our free agency is the only gift we really have that is ours to offer our Savior, and His greatest and everlasting blessings are reserved for those who do so.

Elder Dennis E. Simmons of the Seventy spoke on this point in the April 2004 general conference, in one of the best general conference talks I’ve ever heard. I may be a bit biased, as I was sitting in the choir seats behind Elder Simmons for this talk. (Elder Maxwell also spoke in that session; it was his last conference talk before he passed away.)

He said: “When Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego refused to bow down and worship a golden image set up by the king, a furious Nebuchadnezzar told them that if they would not worship as commanded, they would immediately be cast into a burning fiery furnace. ‘And who is that God that shall deliver you out of my hands?’

“The three young men quickly and confidently responded, ‘If it be so [if you cast us into the furnace], our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand.’ … But then they demonstrated that they fully understood what faith is. They continued, ‘But if not, … we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up.’ That is a statement of true faith. …

“Our God will deliver us from ridicule and persecution, but if not. … Our God will deliver us from sickness and disease, but if not. … He will deliver us from loneliness, depression, or fear, but if not. … Our God will deliver us from threats, accusations, and insecurity, but if not. … He will deliver us from death or impairment of loved ones, but if not, … we will trust in the Lord.

“Our God will see that we receive justice and fairness, but if not. … He will make sure that we are loved and recognized, but if not. … We will receive a perfect companion and righteous and obedient children, but if not, … we will have faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, knowing that if we do all we can do, we will, in His time and in His way, be delivered and receive all that He has” (“But If Not …,” April 2004 general conference).

I testify that our Heavenly Father loves us, so much so that He sent His Son, Jesus Christ, into the world to take our pains, sicknesses, and sins upon Him so that we may return to Them, safe and sound. In the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

Trunk-or-Treat 2023

We had a heckuva great Halloween this year. It began for us last week on Friday, October 27, with our ward's annual Trunk-or-Treat activity. I dressed up as Fat Thor, aka Thor as he appears in the fourth Avengers movie, Endgame. JB chipped in by decorating our car's trunk for the occasion.

First, dinner was served in the cultural hall. There were a number of delicious soups and chilis to choose from, as well as homemade root beer and water to drink. The Primary kids also put on a costume parade on the stage.

The actual trunk-or-treating part was a blast, with a number of neighborhood kids (members of our church along with non-members) stopping by to pick up candy.

Among the other costumes worn was our Bishop's "Fishers of Men" ensemble:

I love it when a ward goes all out for things like this, and ours is no exception.

Humbled or Hardened?

I was recently asked to write an article for the ward newsletter. (Published again! W00t!) Below is the text from my article:

The "war chapters" of the Book of Mormon cover approximately 20 chapters, from Alma 43 through 62. In his account, Mormon takes us through a long, grueling experience for the Nephites as they endure years of hardship and sacrifice. In battle, they and their loved ones are wounded or killed. The people themselves suffer through hunger and sedition within the government. By the conclusion of this terrible war, everyone is understandably exhausted.

At this point, Mormon tells us that "because of the exceedingly great length of the war between the Nephites and the Lamanites many had become hardened, because of the exceedingly great length of the war; and many were softened because of their afflictions, insomuch that they did humble themselves before God, even in the depth of humility" (Alma 62:41).

These people have been through the same experience together. Yet there are two very opposite effects on those who have lived through it. What is the difference between those who have become "hardened" and those who have humbled themselves? Ultimately, it is their attitude.

Not long ago, I read through these chapters in my personal scripture study. I couldn't help but think of the COVID-19 pandemic we've all endured together these past few years. When I came to verse 41, I replaced the word war in my mind with the term pandemic.

"Because of the exceedingly great length of the [pandemic] many had become hardened, because of the exceedingly great length of the [pandemic]; and many were softened because of their afflictions, insomuch that they did humble themselves before God, even in the depth of humility" (Alma 62:41).

Just like the Nephites, we determine our reaction to adversity through our attitude. Will we become hardened by our challenges? Or will we choose to be more humble?

As I've had the opportunity to visit with our ward members, I have learned so much. I have observed that you face a wide array of challenges. Again and again, you have chosen humility over hardness. I'm in constant awe, inspired by the depth of your character and strength. You also strive to take care of each other. Like the people of Alma the Elder at the waters of Mormon, you witness that you "are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places that ye may be in" (Mosiah 18:9).

In return, our Father in Heaven promises that He will "pour out his Spirit more abundantly upon [us]" (Mosiah 18:10).

May we each strive to choose humility through our challenges. "And while [we] strive through grief and pain, His voice is heard: '[We] shall obtain'" (Hymns, no. 134). 

Trunk-or-Treat 2022

On Saturday, our ward held its annual Trunk-or-Treat activity at our meetinghouse. This year, it was combined with a chili (and soup) cookoff, as well as a costume contest for the kids and pumpkin carving/painting contest for everyone.

The chilis were delectable; I faced a hard choice as one of those asked to judge the winners. That meant tasting every chili entry, a task which produced certain, umm ... odors. But that's just the dependable guy I am! The kids' costumes were, likewise, tough to pick winners from. But we made the best decisions we could.

The Trunk-or-Treat portion itself out in the parking lot was a big hit and was very well attended from ward members and neighbors. Once again, I dressed up as Dwight Schrute from the TV show "The Office." JB was good enough to decorate our car with Dunder Mifflin stuff to go along with it. We passed out Snickers, 100 Grand, Milky Way---strictly the good stuff.

Death, Taxes, and a Few Other Sure Things

I was asked to give a short talk in my ward's sacrament meeting today. I have posted my remarks below. Happy Easter, friends.

Jana and I recently watched the new Ken Burns documentary on Benjamin Franklin, one of our Founding Fathers. I’m a history buff, and I even majored in the subject in college until I realized one day, “Yikes, I’m majoring in history.” Franklin’s is, of course, the portrait on one of my favorite pieces of U.S. currency. If a hip hop musical were ever created about his life, I would most seriously consider listening to it.

It was interesting to me to learn that when the Constitution was adopted, he wasn’t completely sure it was last---though he hoped it would. He observed: “In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes.” A cynic today might look at the state of the world and reach the same conclusion.

Five years ago this weekend, death and taxes converged for me on the same day when my father passed away following a long illness on Saturday, April 15 (2017). Earlier that day, I got the impression to go and visit him in the care center. Jana and I were dating at that time, and she got the same impression. I’m so glad we followed that prompting. Had I waited to go and visit him the next day, on Easter Sunday, with the Easter candy I planned to bring, it would’ve been too late.

On that day, I got to hug him one last time and tell him once more that I loved him. Just a few hours later, he was gone. The doctors had given him six months; he lasted only nine more days. Though it was an expected loss, it occurred unexpectedly quickly, and it was a painful one.

When I arrived at the hospital that night, Dad had already passed. My siblings and I recalled numerous funny stories we remembered about Dad; it was a mix of laughter amid the tears. Upon leaving the hospital, I suddenly realized that it was past midnight, and that the day had changed from Saturday night to Sunday morning---it was Easter morning! The timing of this loss was a tender mercy to me and to our family.

In addition, the Comforter came in an unexpected way. The words of a favorite scripture appeared in my mind as I drove home. I saw or heard them repeated very clearly:

“I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die” (John 11:25-26).

In the April 1992 general conference, Elder Marion D. Hanks of the Seventy related the following:

“Let me share with you the tender story of an eleven-year-old boy named Philip, a Down’s syndrome child who was in a Sunday School class with eight other children.

“Easter Sunday the teacher brought an empty plastic egg for each child. They were instructed to go out of the church building onto the grounds and put into the egg something that would remind them of the meaning of Easter.

“All returned joyfully. As each egg was opened there were exclamations of delight at a butterfly, a twig, a flower, a blade of grass. Then the last egg was opened. It was Philip’s, and it was empty!

“Some of the children made fun of Philip. ‘But, teacher,’ he said, ‘teacher, the tomb was empty.’

“A newspaper article announcing Philip’s death a few months later noted that at the conclusion of the funeral eight children marched forward and put a large empty egg on the small casket. On it was a banner that said, ‘The tomb was empty’” (Ensign, May 1992, p. 11).

The tomb was empty---and yet that tomb with nothing and no one inside gave us everything! Our Savior gave us the two greatest gifts He could: triumphing over sin through the Atonement and over death with His Resurrection. Beyond death and taxes, the gospel gives us so many certain things in this life, and many reasons to have great hope in the next one.

The Prophet Joseph Smith taught: “The fundamental principles of our religion are the testimony of the Apostles and Prophets concerning Jesus Christ, that he died, was buried, and rose again the third day, and ascended to heaven; and all other things which pertain to our religion are only appendages to it” (Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, p. 121).

That is why we are here, today and every other week. We take the sacrament as an appendage to the Atonement and the Resurrection. We meet here on Sundays as an appendage. Our missionary and temple work are appendages to it. We have so much to be grateful for and so many reasons to rejoice this day and every other as followers of Christ.

Brothers and sisters, I know that my Redeemer lives. I also know that the gift of the Holy Ghost is real and is also one of our Father’s greatest gifts to us. In the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

Trunk-or-Treat 2021

This year's ward trunk-or-treat for Halloween, our first one in two years, was held Saturday afternoon in the parking lot outside of our meetinghouse. The bishopric cooked up and served hamburgers and hot dogs for everyone while we passed out candy to the kids.

JB decorated our trunk to look like it was a mouth. I dressed up in my Blue Shirt Guy costume, inspired by the movie Free Guy. This was somehow appropriate, as we were in the parking spot next to the White Shirt Guys, aka our missionaries. It was an enjoyable afternoon spent with the good people of the Stone Creek Ward.

Arbuckle Family Dinner/June 2020

It was a mild late-spring day Sunday, for which we made the trek out to Grantsville for sacrament meeting with JB's parents, including a Sunday School lesson on Alma and Amulek in the Book of Mormon.

Following our home-centered church meetings, we held monthly family dinner. The menu consisted of tinfoil dinners, along with rolls, fruit, and other goodies.

We also went outside to make s'mores. I may be picking the marshmallow out of my beard for the rest of the week, but I have no regrets.

Mother's Day 2020

COVID-19 didn't cancel Mother's Day this year, fortunately, and the Plowbuckles honored the day the best we could. I got to spend the day with three wonderful women whom I honor on the Mother's Day holiday.

Following church services at home, including a study of the week's Come, Follow Me lesson about the prophet Abinadi, we stopped over in West Bountiful to spend some time with Mom in the backyard on a nice, cool May afternoon. (Leia loves that backyard and had a blast running herself ragged all over the place.)

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We also got to spend some time with my wonderful mother-in-law (and the rest of the in-laws) for another Zoom family dinner and game night.

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I also managed to catch this candid glimpse of my amazing wife, hard at work at her sewing machine; she can often be found working selflessly on blankets, capes (you know, for kids!), quilts, and other creative projects for her loved ones: 

Easter 2020

This year's Easter Sunday was unlike any other we had previously experienced. Due to COVID-19 social distancing guidelines, we were unable to worship together with our ward members at the local meetinghouse, nor could we gather with family members for an Easter egg hunt or for family dinner. However, we still held church in our home, partaking of the sacrament and then studying this week's Come, Follow Me lesson together.

Through the use of modern technology, we used mobile devices to join in together with the in-laws on a Zoom family dinner meeting, through which we were able to check in with everybody and to make sure they are all doing OK.

The bishop and his wife also made a socially distant visit, dropping off this Easter-themed gift:

The rabbit's head is a roll of toilet paper, and its ears are a dish towel—two very useful gifts in these days of spending more time at home.

Thaw

Well! The weather is starting to warm up slightly as we move into some lousy Smarch weather this week. But that's not what this post today is about.

Rather, it's a post about our relationship with the next door neighbors. This relationship has been somewhat cool as long as I have known (or, more accurately, been acquainted with) them. They are technically members of our ward but are not active, nor have I once seen them in our ward building. (Editor's note: No, this of course has no bearing on whether or not these are good people. It's just that most of the people in my neighborhood I've become acquainted with have come through our participation in the ward.)

I have, of course, run into the neighbors here and there in the nearly two years now that JB and I have bordered the same space as them, plus the 1+ year JB and dated/were engaged that she lived there before I moved in.

Our encounters with them were often the same; I would wave and/or say hello (like Mom and Dad taught me to do), and the husband would not ever say or do anything to acknowledge it. The wife sometimes would. Often, they would be with their kids in the family car, so I would chalk it up to their being busy with them and try to give them the benefit of the doubt.

Out of nowhere one December day, they brought us over some holiday goodies while one of us was recovering from a medical procedure. More recently, their two little girls showed up on our doorstep selling Girl Scout cookies. Four boxes of Samoas and Tagalongs later, we were having an actual conversation with our neighbors.

A few minutes after they delivered the cookies, JB and I got in the car to head off to a family gathering, and I happened to glance at the husband who (get ready for this ... as in the oft-played-at-sporting-events-song "Get Ready for This") waved and smiled at us as we drove off.

By small and simple things is the lesson here ... I guess? The other lesson being: Girl Scout cookies are still one of the greatest forces for good in the universe.

Timing: Four Years Later

About four years ago, when I was still stranded on the Island of Misfit Toys, one of the counselors in the bishopric called me to be the ward Sunday School president. The only thing is ... life got in the way. I was in the middle of some serious health problems, and I was unable to accept the calling.

If any of this sounds familiar, it's because I actually blogged about this experience here on Paco Nation. If you have a few more minutes to kill, you can read all about it here.

The point of this is not to rehash said experience; it's, in fact, to relate the fact that there is ... a little bit more to the story.

Bro. Hill assured me back then that the calling was always right; the timing perhaps wasn't. As of just a few months ago, it turns out that he was 100 percent correct. Whatever the timing may have been on it, the bishop recently called yours truly to be the new ward Sunday School president.

I have held a lot of callings and have served in a lot of Church positions over the years, but I haven't been a president of anything since I was a deacons quorum president over 30 years ago. (Yes, Paco is getting old. Don't look so shocked, in spite of his baby face.)

This is somewhat unfamiliar territory for me, but it's been great. I have wonderful counselors and a secretary to help me. Beyond that, I'm just sort of showing up and figuring out the rest. It's an exciting time to be involved with the Sunday School program and to see how the Come, Follow Me program is blessing families and individuals in our ward. I also get to go to ward council meetings every Sunday morning for a half-hour to try to feel useful.

This experience was a gentle reminder from a loving Heavenly Father that His promises do come to pass and that His chosen servants are truly inspired, both at the worldwide level as well as the local/ward level. I can't wait to see what else the future may hold.

Dallin's Farewell

On Sunday afternoon, we journeyed up to Layton and the Oak Woods Ward sacrament meeting, along with the other Plowmans/Woods and a few of our cousins, to hear my nephew Dallin deliver his missionary farewell address. It was good to see a number of familiar faces (beyond family, of course) from the two years I spent as a member of that ward from 2012 to 2014.

Following the meeting, we went over to Mike's and Jana's home to enjoy some delicious food and also to visit with a number of family friends who showed up to wish Dallin well.

It was a beautiful autumn afternoon. Christian and Graham enjoyed playing in the leaves out on the front lawn:

. . . and Danny joined in on the fun, too.

We are feeling all of the emotions that a family can feel when one of our own beloved members leaves for the mission field. (Incidentally, Dallin entered the MTC today and has begun his missionary labors as I type this.) I'm honestly quite excited for him, because I know what an amazing experience is just ahead. Hardly anyone could be as happy for him as is JB, who served in the same mission from September 1999 through March 2001.

In my head, I still see that little kid I carried on my shoulders through the streets of Brighton, Colorado, and a number of other memories from his growing-up years. These kids grow up way too fast.

Some of the best growing up is just ahead. We are grateful to have another Elder Plowman out in the mission field.

Issac's Blessing

The first Fast Sunday of the year was also the day on which my nephew Isaac Jeffrey was given his LDS baby blessing by his father, Jeff. Yours truly, along with Ike's other uncles and a couple of grandparents, stood in the circle for the priesthood ordinance.

Afterward, we congregated at Jeff's brother's house for a family brunch. I provided a box of Mike & Ike candy I found at the store last week for this very photo op:

Unfortunately, Ike began to cry just as I was about to snap the photo.

It's always great to be surrounded by family, including part of Scott's and Claudia's gang. My cousin Jared's son Jordan was also in town from California and joined us for this occasion.

Prophet of the People

This past Sunday, I was asked to go to the care center branch in our stake to give a talk in their sacrament meeting service. I have been attending and helping out with various functions at this branch for a number of years now, and I never cease to be floored the amazing people in the branch and the Spirit I feel each time I go. This time was no exception.

For my topic, I chose to speak on the Prophet Joseph Smith, as his birthday (December 23) is another birthday we recognize around this time of year. In concluding my message, I got to once again stand before a congregation of the Church and bear testimony of our latter-day prophets, in particular my witness that President Thomas S. Monson holds the same keys Joseph held.

Then, last night, I went to the local Megaplex for my fourth viewing (don't look so shocked) of Star Wars: The Last Jedi. As the closing credits began to roll, I checked my phone for any text messages or news. I was deeply saddened to read more than one post on social media alerting me that our dear prophet had passed away earlier in the evening.

As a Church, we're always sorrowful when any of the General Authorities shuffle off this mortal coil, but especially so when it's our president. I join with my fellow Latter-day Saints today in mourning this wonderful, bold, caring, exemplary man who has now been reunited with the wife he lost a few years ago and has gone onto his reward in the rest of our Lord.

If you're a Latter-day Saint and are looking for a great read, or even if you're just a friend of the Church, I would highly recommend reading his biography, To the Rescue, by Heidi Swinton. It's a phenomenal book. I learned so many things about our prophet that I did not previously know. For example, in all of the years he went to East Germany behind the Iron Curtain, he was warned by the U.S. Embassy more than once that they could probably not do anything to get him out if something went wrong—and yet he went anyway, time and again. This is the kind of person he was.

I know President Thomas S. Monson was a prophet of God. I also know that those of us who remain behind in these troubled times have nothing to fear, that in a short amount of time we'll see the First Presidency reorganized and another called to lead us with great faith and strength in his absence. My thoughts and prayers are also with President Russell M. Nelson and the other members of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles today.

Christmas and a Galaxy Far, Far Away

So! Our Christmas Eve and Christmas Day celebrations were wonderful, too.

We attended a brief church block Sunday, consisting of sacrament meeting only, that featured Christmas music by the ward choir and talks by the bishop, his wife, and Pres. Gibbons of the stake presidency. After that, it was over to Mom's house for Christmas Eve with the Plowmans.

Following a hearty dinner, we participated in a brief retelling of the Christmas story together, as is our custom. My sister had the foresight a few years ago to record Dad reading the text from Chapter 2 of Luke, and that is what we listened to as the kids acted out the parts of Mary, Joseph, the shepherds, the three wise men, and the animals in the manger. It made Dad feel not that far away at all during our first Christmas as a family without him.

Meanwhile, Kira drew this picture of "Fatty" the reindeer:

Pass the Parcel followed for the kids. JB and I prepared the parcel and the goodies this time around, and I think they enjoyed the candy as well as the holiday swag they nabbed. We then exchanged family gifts. Yours truly and JB ended up with this gem:

Fortunately, JB's family spends Christmas Day together, which works out well for our collective plans. Over at her parents' house, we gathered for breakfast, games, football, and another gift exchange. JB gave me this:

. . . which actually contained "Weird Al" concert tickets inside!

Has Star Wars felt like a recurring theme during this post? So it goes. While we're on the subject, and for the record: We've seen Episode VIII, Star Wars: The Last Jedi, three times now, and it just keeps getting better each time.

White Christmas

I don't know if it was particularly the White Christmas Bing |Crosby dreamed of or the one from his nightmares, but whatever it was, this was the scene outside this morning:

I didn't care much for all of the new snow while on my way to our one-hour church meeting (sacrament meeting only), as the roads weren't that cooperative on the way into Bountiful. But they were cleaner and better on the way home, and I'm grateful for the snowplow drivers who left the comfort of home and family on Christmas Day to clear the roads.

Looking out at the scene now as the day winds to its close, I daresay that all is calm, and all is bright.

The Opposite of Love

"Why does everyone want to go away? I love being home. But I don't like being left behind."
 -Beth, in Louisa May Alcott's Little Women

A few years ago, I attended a Sunday School class in which the teacher expressed the belief that the opposite of love isn't hate; it's indifference.

I have thought about that lesson a number of times since, and I think there is a great deal of truth to it. With hate, which we normally would think to be the emotion directly opposite of love, there is at least some feeling there for you, even if it is a negatively influenced one. With indifference, there is no real acknowledgement of any feeling at all. It is apathy; it is ignorance.

I didn't realize until recently, though, that the teacher was quoting Elie Wiesel, Holocaust survivor and 1986 Nobel Peace Prize winner, who just passed away last month:

"The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it's indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it's indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, it's indifference."

Indifference, then, causes a whole host of problems. Lack of caring about or acknowledging a problem, let alone doing something about it, leads to disastrous consequences. Fortunately, we do not deal with issues today that are anywhere nearly as serious as the horrors Wiesel faced during World War II, and I'm not attempting to address anything anywhere near that deep tonight.

This is not to say, however, that indifference hasn't crept into our society in less-subtle ways. Indifference is still alive and well under our very eyes. I see it all around, and it often appears in the form of cliques.

Cliques are great for those who belong to them, and that's fine and dandy. But what inherently happens with them is not that people are included but that other people, by definition, are left out or are forgotten.

This issue means a great deal to me because I have often found myself on the outside at one point or another during nearly every age and stage in life. I've seen cliques in my neighborhood, at school, at church, in the workplace, in my extracurricular activities, and even as a missionary. I have also been bullied on multiple occasions, which may be the ultimate rejection or feeling of being left out of a group. Many people never actually grow out of cliques, for I see them all over the place today. For all I know, there will always be cliques; there may be cliques at PTA meetings or in the retirement home.

As a result of my experiences, I suppose life has fine-tuned me to feel and see the needs of those left behind, and though I have not always been able to include everyone in everything, I have made an honest effort, albeit not a perfect one, to include as many as I could. My life has, likewise, been greatly blessed by those wonderful individuals who have reached out the hand of fellowship to me and have lifted my hands and my spirit when they have hung low, whether due to chemical or other reasons.

How rare is the true friend who sticks around; whose interest in you is motivated by true concern, patience, and shared mutual interests; and who is there by not assignment nor motivated by convenience. There's a handful of you who fit this bill, and you are appreciated greatly.

If you currently find yourself in a clique, I invite you to consider someone who might not be there at your next gathering but whom you could invite to join you. Or look for someone different to sit by next time. I assure you that you won't have to look too far to find them, because they are all around, and they are longing for friends. If you're not currently part of a clique, I invite you to come and sit by me, and we'll make fun of the cliques together.

Seriously, though, and not to make this sound too much like a Sunday School lesson of my own, but I feel like this idea fits the theme of the Island of Misfit Toys, which is: "Each one bring one." As one of the counselors in the bishopric taught on this topic: "You all know who sits 'alone' even though they're surrounded by a lot of people."

The Bro Code at Church

The Bro Code.

It's a very specific code for us males, and when I say specific, I mean, not really that specific, as in it's not written down somewhere but rather sort of just understood. Because we tend not to worry about stuff like this and then agonize over it and talk it over with our best friends to find out what she really, really meant by that until we realize it's 3 a.m. and we have to get up for work in a few hours. No, we use that time to either play video games and talk about comic book plots.

There are a few absolutes in the Bro Code:

If it's just you and a male friend at a movie, there must be at least one seat in between the two of you.

The same principle applies to using the stalls in a public bathroom. You gotta have that one-toilet buffer zone between you.

Be a good wingman. Help a guy out.

You also don't date someone a good friend of yours has dated, at least not recently. Or something.

Anything else would be frowned upon and might lead to a Lifetime movie exposing the horrors of breaking the Bro Code.

Fortunately, there's also a sort of Bro Code at work at church. In my previous ward, an elder gentleman often politely went out of his way to help me out with my collar and tie whenever I came down with a case of Deacon's Collar, which happened all-too frequently for someone such as myself who had served a mission and who worked at the Church Office Building for years and who has tied literally thousands of ties over the years.

Note: Deacon's Collar in the LDS faith is not the same thing as Deacon's Collar in, say, the Catholic faith. It refers to looking like you tied your tie in the dark, or with one arm tied behind your back. (Deacon's Collar is a real, Google-able term you can search for.)

Then, there are those times when you are running late for church, and earlier you've put on the new sweater that your mom gave you for Christmas a few weeks ago, except you wanted to try it on first to make sure it fit before you removed the tags and stickers, and you forgot all about the tags and stickers that were still attached to it, and you walked hurriedly into the chapel with these items on full display to the public to try to find a seat. In this instance, the Bro Code clearly dictates that someone must step up and either make you aware of these tags and stickers and/or remove them himself.

So, thank goodness for that.

Issued Warnings

Twenty-three years, seven months, and eight days.

According to my estimation, that's how long I had been driving before being pulled over for the first time ever by a Bountiful City policeman Sunday while on the way to church.

My crime? I wasn't wearing my seatbelt.

I saw the lights flash in my rearview mirror, realized I had failed to buckle up in my rush to get where I was going early (seats in the chapel are becoming harder and harder to come by as the Island of Misfit Toys expands—now with nearly 600 members!), and I instantly knew that I was toast.

Well, it was a good run while it lasted.

Fortunately, the officer—Officer Plowman! (no relation)—was very kind and let me go with just a warning. My record of driving without a moving violation remains intact. Along with the warning, he gave me a very educational pamphlet with some harrowing data.

"If you or anyone in your vehicle aren't properly restrained," it read, "you can be issued a $45 citation."

The possibility of a fine sure gets your attention. But how about these statistics, which were also included:

"During the last five years, nearly half of fatalities on Utah's roads were unbuckled."
"Three out of four people ejected from the car in an accident perish."
"When the driver is belted, 87% of children also ride with a seatbelt. Be an example and buckle up."

Thank goodness for the warning. "It won't happen again, Officer," I assured him.

Then, as I went on my way and drove the rest of the distance to church, the thought that occurred to me was this: It's good to have warnings given, or else far-worse consequences are in store for ignoring the law or repeated violations. The consequences could be dire, indeed. My not wearing a seatbelt doesn't affect only me; it could be dangerous to others, as well.

Consider an oft-ignored or ridiculed warning such as this:


"We warn that individuals who violate covenants of chastity, who abuse spouse or offspring, or who fail to fulfill family responsibilities will one day stand accountable before God. Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets."

What a blessing it is to have prophets, seers, and revelators who can see the storms, both ongoing and forthcoming, and who warn us accordingly. They do so not to limit our choices or to have power or control over us but, because they both know that ultimate happiness is impossible through sin (see Alma 41:10) and they can see what is coming, they do so out of love and genuine, Christlike concern for all of God's children.

To ignore such a warning—well, the consequences could be dire, indeed.

Disturbers and Annoyers

The Island of Misfit Toys went to stake conference this past weekend. I had to miss the Saturday night session due to a prior commitment (improv up in Clearfield), but I got to go to Sunday afternoon's excellent concluding session. During his talk, one of the counselors in the Salt Lake City mission presidency, who was visiting our stake, shared and expounded upon Joseph Smith—History 1:20, which reads in part:

"It seems as though the adversary was aware, at a very early period of my life, that I was destined to prove a disturber and an annoyer of his kingdom (emphasis added)."

I love this scripture, and I love the phrase "a disturber and an annoyer."

Many people might be offended to be called either a "disturber" (disturbed?) or an "annoyer"—but not this Paco. When it comes to disturbing or annoying of this nature, I consider it to be a badge of honor.

I recently spent some time on Facebook doing some profile stalking—like you do—in which I looked at the profiles of numerous people who once used to be my friends but who have now unfriended me.

Disclaimer: I have not ever unfriended someone on Facebook for having a different viewpoint or opinion on any matter. (If someone has been outwardly rude or insulting—the opposite of being a "friend"—then that is a different matter altogether.)

There's a few more who had unfriended than I had previously believed. And many of them, I'm rather positive, have unfriended me because of my views on political and/or moral issues. In fact, I'm certain of it.

This fact used to bother me, but it really doesn't now. I'm okay with it. My views are not shared with malice. They are not meant to offend nor to irritate but, rather, they are expressed out of love for the gospel and the Father's great Plan of Happiness, and for the joy that they bring me and my family. They are meant not to disturb or to annoy my friends but, instead, to disturb and to annoy someone else entirely.

As President Hinckley once said, "We are compelled by our doctrine to speak out" ("Why We Do Some of the Things We Do," October 1999 general conference).

The First Amendment: It's fan-tastic!

"For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places (Ephesians 6:12; emphasis added)."

I've been told by some that I talk about politics a great deal. Well, I'm guilty as charged. It's because there's a great deal of spiritual wickedness in high places in our time. It's not only in foreign lands, but it's right here in the United States—in Washington, D.C., as well as locally, too. It's another reason why I speak out.

While watching an episode of the Ken Burns documentary "The Roosevelts" today, I heard this magnificent quote from one of my top 5 favorite U.S. presidents, Teddy:

"Neutrality does not serve righteousness; for to be neutral between right and wrong is to serve wrong."‪

In other words, if you're not a disturber or an annoyer, than you might unwittingly be one who aids and abets.

I can't stay neutral. I feel I must stand up for many of the things I believe. I'm happy to be among the disturbers and annoyers. And I'm trying my best not to be disturbing nor annoying in the process.

There is a difference.