First Impressions and Second Chances

Topic Number 3 in "Paco's Series on Tips for Getting a Date, But Then Again This Is Paco Blogging Here; He May Not Really Know What He's Talking about, So Take It for Whatever You Will" is: first impressions.

When it comes to the subject of first impressions, I'll never forget when I first saw a missionary I served with, Elder Flores. I first met this elder in the mission office, on the day he arrived in the field. We never spoke at that time, but I sensed that he looked at me kind of . . . strange. It was an odd feeling, and it left me feeling like the guy just didn't like the look of me very much.

I'm happy to say that my initial impression was dead wrong. I didn't see this elder again for several months until I was transferred to serve in the same zone with him in the city of Cusco, Peru. My bad first impression of him dissolved when I shook his hand, got to know him a little bit better, and in time realized that he and I shared much of the same sense of humor and laughed at many of the same things.

Something else I learned about that earlier first impression: Going into the mission field was Elder Flores's first time outside of his native city and that I was, literally, the first gringo (American) he had ever laid eyes on. For him, that first impression was one far different.

Due to a temporary transfer that occurred not long after this, Elder Flores and I even served together as companions for most of a week, and they were joyful days for us both. I learned something about humility from him, because although he stuttered when he spoke, this struggle had given him strength to, at the same time, testify of gospel truths with power and assurance.

What this has to do with meeting new people/dating: First impressions (at least mine) are not always correct. When we meet someone else for the first time, we must consider the possibility that that person might be having a bad day for any number of reasons, or we might be having a bad day, or any number of other issues may factor in to our perception of that person or that person's perception of us.

Sometimes, second, third, fourth, and more impressions give us a pretty good idea of what a person may be like. Sometimes, it takes a few more.

At the same time, no, I'm not saying you should accept a date with someone you already know is not compatible with you or about whom you have some seriously bad vibes.

I know you ladies know what I'm talking about here, because essentially every Jane Austen story and every chick flick involves a romance between two people who instantly hate each other when they first meet and who then grow to love each other over time.